Nightclub photo no-nos

By Deanna Rilling

Wednesday, April 21, 2010 | 7:35 p.m.

You have no solid recollection of what happened last night, but your friends found the club photos online. That’s when it hits you: You are a hot mess. And hundreds of people have already clicked on the tragic picture that just might prevent you from pursuing a career in politics.

Sure, we all make stupid and cheesy poses from time to time when hanging out in clubs. There are bunny ears, death by ice scoop and the peace sign/kissy-face combo (guilty as charged). But more often than not, it’s the unintentionally humorous-in-a-tragic way pics that stand out. Vegas photographer Mikey McNulty (mikeymcnulty.com) provided us with examples of nightclub photo no-nos—not shot in Vegas, so relax, clubbers—and tips on how not to be that guy or girl.

1 Balling with the singles. Yes, those are $1 bills. Folks, you’re at the nightclub, not a strip club. McNulty jokes that if you’re gonna pull out a wad of cash, “make sure they’re at least fives.”

2 Oh, girl-on-girl kissing. If any guy wants to see two chicks make out, just bring a camera and say you’re a club photographer. Since we were going for anonymity, you probably can’t tell the girl on the right is cringing, but she is. “When you make out with someone, make sure they want to make out with you,” advises McNulty.

3 Check yourself before you wreck yourself. Your bra is showing. Or sometimes something worse …

4 Don’t throw gang signs in a photo. Especially if you aren’t in a gang. Something tells us these two white chicks from Connecticut didn’t grow up in the ’hood.

5 Don’t expose yourself to a club photographer because it could end up on the ‘net… or in the Las Vegas Weekly.

6 Amateur fully-clothed porn star wannabes?

7 “Say hello to my little friends.” Kudos for getting two chicks at the same time, dude, but the “rock on” hand gesture coupled with a reject from the Saturday Night Fever or Scarface wardrobe closet is right up there with Ed Hardy tees on the douche scale.

8 Let’s reiterate once again and repeat after us: “It’s a nightclub, not a strip club. It’s a nightclub, not a strip club.”

And an example of what to do... In case you’ve forgotten the hours you spent practicing for your yearbook photo, smiling makes all the difference in the world. Being a group of stylish hotties doesn’t hurt, either.