Hawk Krall
Thursday, Aug. 6, 2009 | midnight
As is often the case in heady times, recent events have forced an expansion of our vocabulary. New phrases have been thrust into use; old ones have acquired fresh meanings. Some examples.
Cash for clunkers: (slang) The process of seeking casino investors.
Echelon: (v.) To abruptly halt a promising project. “I was puttin’ the moves on this chick when my wife walked in and totally echeloned us.”
Ensign: (v.) A reckless failure of self-control. “I got drunk last night and ensigned myself.”
Gibbons: (v.) Inability to grasp the “self” in self-inflicted wound (previously, to “dario”).
Integrity check: (n.) This combination of words has never before been pondered in Vegas, so its meaning is unclear.
Sin: (n.) 1. Entirely theoretical behavior that most certainly doesn’t happen here, federal travel planners (see totally hypothetical rendering, above); 2. What happens everywhere here, excitement-starved Midwestern tourists (see entirely realistic rendering, above).
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