Friday, June 10, 2005 | 8:27 a.m.
When it comes to real estate, location is everything. It's possible the same rule applies to stand-up comedy -- at least in Long Island, N.Y.
Billy Crystal, Eddie Murphy, Lenny Bruce, Andy Kaufman, Jerry Seinfeld, Rosie O'Donnell, Ray Romano, Carol Leifer, Wendy Liebman, Jackie "The Jokeman" Martling and the late Alan King are among the famous funny folks who were either born and bred there or at some point called the suburban area home.
Adam Ferrara is one of the latter, born in the nearby borough of Queens and raised as part of a large, boisterous Italian clan in Long Island.
"I don't know specifically if it's the place itself or just the people," Ferrara -- who headlines through Sunday at The Improv at Harrah's -- pondered about his humor-heavy hometown during a recent call from Lake Tahoe, where he was performing.
It's likely a bit of both.
"My family is brutally honest, and they have no idea how funny they are," he says. "They're loud, and you don't realize it until you go to somebody else's house for dinner. I remember noticing, 'God, it's so quiet. Don't you people drink? Doesn't anybody owe anybody money?' "
If it isn't apparent, Ferrara's kin have long been a source of fodder for his sarcasm-laced comedy. The death of his grandmother this year sent some family members into a tailspin, he says.
"Italians are like an opera, (wailing), 'Take me,' with the flowers all over the body -- the big, horseshoe-shaped flowers, like she won the Kentucky Derby," he jokes.
"My dopey cousins were at the funeral (crying), 'Why?' She's 92 with one leg. 'Why?' How 'bout, 'About time'? My grandmother's last words were, 'F------ finally!' Every system shut down, but you couldn't kill her. She was like a Dodge Dart, she wouldn't die."
Comedy wasn't Ferrara's first career choice. In his younger years, he played guitar in a "really awful" band. "I realized, 'Well, this isn't it.' "
In college, he studied finance -- sort of. "I can't balance my checkbook, are you kiddin' me? I went to school (and said), 'Uh, lemme just get this degree.' "
He finally found his calling on July 13, 1988, the day he first set foot on a comedy stage: "I felt, 'OK, I can do this.' "
In the years since, Ferrara has released two comedy CDs (his third, tentatively titled "Showbiz," is due to drop this summer); received a pair of American Comedy Award nominations; and had two half-hour comedy specials air on Comedy Central.
"They've always been good to me," Ferrara says of the cable network, on which he's guested on the stand-up series "Premium Blend" and"Comic Remix," and as a panelist on "Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn." He also appeared in the network's documentary "Contest Searchlight"; and in 2003 on "New York Friar's Club Roast of Dennis Leary." The following year, several of Ferrara's comedy bits were transformed into cartoons for the series "Shorties Watchin' Shorties.' "
For a time Ferrara lived in Los Angeles, where he studied acting. He's had roles on a slew of prime-time series, including "Caroline in the City," "Law & Order" and "The King of Queens." He also starred in a commercial for the Olive Garden restaurant chain that ran "over and over and over again."
"It doesn't matter what I do from now on -- I could win an Academy Award -- I'm still gonna be the Olive Garden" pitch man, he concedes. "It's like Stallone's porno movie: It doesn't matter, it's coming up."
Interestingly, "I found out that my timing as an actor has greatly benefited" from working onstage as a comic, Ferrara says, as has his ability to write material. "The whole (acting) theory that I studied is just getting out of your head, getting into the body ... because the minute you think, you're dead.
"I find I write more onstage just by actually improving. I record every show and listen back to the tapes, and that's my writing process." Unlike some of his contemporaries, "I can't sit down with a notebook and newspapers and just rattle off 10 jokes. I admire the comics who can do that, but with my ADD (attention deficit disorder) and my caffeine addiction, I can't do that," he quips.
In 2001, Ferrara moved to the Big Apple to star on the ABC series "The Job," opposite his pal Leary.
"That was great. I was a working actor in New York City on a single-camera show," Ferrara says of the two seasons he spent portraying police detective Tommy Manetti. "I really enjoyed playing a cop. What guy doesn't wanna play cops and robbers, and wear guns and everything?"
To research the role, Ferrara (who declines to reveal his age) says he reunited with some old high school buddies who became New York police officers. The connection proved especially handy once, when the comedian found himself running late to an important "table read" of "The Job's" script for network execs.
In desperation, "I called my friend Tommy the cop and I said, 'Look, I've gotta get over to the theater,' " Ferrara recalls. "He said, 'Stand outside your apartment.' He came right over with the (squad) car, with the lights on, and he drove me through traffic with the police siren on to get me there on time. That was great. And I got out like I was getting out of a cab: 'Thanks, boys. See ya later.' "
The folks back in Long Island must be so proud.
Out for laughs
Harland Williams ("Dumb & Dumber," "Half Baked") and Judah Friedlander of VH1's "Best Week Ever" headline "The Hollywood Comedy Tour" at 8 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Saturday at The Palms. Tickets are $25.
Jay Leno performs at 9 p.m. tonight and 10:30 p.m. Saturday at The Mirage's Danny Gans Theatre. Tickets are $85 plus tax.
As of our deadline, tickets remained for Jerry Seinfeld's 10:30 p.m. show tonight at Caesars Palace. His 7:30 p.m. performances tonight and Saturday, however, are sold out.
Howie Mandel checks into MGM Grand's Hollywood Theatre Tuesday through June 29. Show time is 9 p.m.; tickets are $60.
Laugh Lines friend Bob Golub, who began production earlier this year on the film version of his one-man show "Dodo," takes the stage Tuesday through June 19 at The Improv at Harrah's.
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