The Strip as Main Street

By Ken Miller (contact)

Thursday, Jan. 14, 2010 | 12:39 p.m.

What if the Las Vegas Strip was your Main Street?

If you're a local, it sort of is. Would you know where to get your everyday needs met — without checking into a hotel?

Turns out, for all its glitz, the Strip isn't much different from any other Main Street USA. Most of what you'd look for on almost any other primary thoroughfare can be found between Mandalay Bay and the Stratosphere.

A few examples:

Main Street has the historical museum. The Strip has the Bellagio Gallery of Fine Art, now the only real art gallery on the Strip (although CityCenter itself, with its amalgam of world-famous architects, almost functions as a work of art in and of itself.) The gallery's hours are 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Sunday through Thursday and 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Friday and Saturday.

Main has the city bus. The Strip has, well, pretty much everything. The Monorail is only one small part of what you can grab on Las Vegas Boulevard — buses, trams, trolleys, taxis, shuttles, jeez. The Monorail's hours of operation are 7 a.m. to 2 a.m. Monday through Thursday and 7 a.m. to 3 a.m. Friday through Sunday. Single-ride tickets are $5, day passes are $14 and three-day passes are $30. The trolley is $1.50, and its hours are 9:30 a.m. to 2 a.m. on 20-minute intervals. City buses run all day and are $2.

Main Street has the corner drugstore. The Strip has a drugstore on almost every corner. There are drugstores aplenty spread around the Strip, mostly Walgreens and CVS, any of which will gladly fill a prescription.

Main Street has the family doctor. The Strip has ... well, not exactly M.D.s, but you can certainly get care for a variety of ailments. Walgreens has a Take Care Clinic at 3339 Las Vegas Blvd. South (near the Venetian) where, from 8 a.m. to 7:30 p.m. weekdays and 9:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. weekends, a board-certified family nurse practitioner can help with anything from pinkeye to ear infections. There's also the Minute Clinic, provided by CVS, at 3758 Las Vegas Blvd. South (near Monte Carlo), which provides similar services from 8:30 a.m. to 7:30 p.m. weekdays, 9 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. Saturdays and 10 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. Sundays.

Main Street has the barbershop. The Strip has Art of Shaving. This Mandalay Place establishment has become a favorite of quite a few locals, with its top-notch staff and aromatherapy skin treatments providing the most relaxing shave you'll ever get.

Main Street has the arcade. The Strip has Gameworks, next to MGM Grand. In addition to some of the classics, this place always has the latest innovations in interactive entertainment. And there's rock climbing, too.

Main Street has the dog-grooming parlor. The Strip has Viva Dogs Vegas at Mandalay Place, the only place you'll ever need to go if you're heavy into dog-spoiling. Shoot, they even sell tiny robes for the pups to wear after baths.

Main Street has the newsstand. The Strip has Streetcorner News at the Miracle Mile Shops at Planet Hollywood.

Main Street has the Laundromat. The Strip ... well, Main Street beats us on this point. There isn't one. There are a few just a few blocks away, but you'll have to leave the friendly confines on this one.

Main Street has a grocery store. The Strip has convenience stores, which means you'll probably end up paying more than you expect on menial items such as bread and peanut butter. Specifically, we recommend the ABC Store in, of all places, the Fashion Show Mall. Or you can go to the Bonanza Gift Stores at the intersection of the Strip and Sahara, where, among the usual Vegas trinkets, you can get groceries and liquor.

The Strip = Main Street

• Instead of the town drunk, we have ... lots and lots of drunks!

• Instead of the fountain, we have ... a much more kick-ass one than any Main Street. Thank you, Bellagio.

• Instead of the traffic cop with a whistle, we have ... Metro officers with tasers.

• Instead of the annoying traveling salesman, we have ... porn-card guys. No less annoying, but at least they can't come up to your door.

• Instead of the neighborhood park, we have ... the volcano at the Mirage. Yeah, it's fake nature, but this is Vegas. Take what you can get!

• Instead of a parade, we have ... people watching. Hey, we've been to tons of parades. Our money's on checking out the out-of-towners while chowing down at Mon Ami Gabi.

• Instead of statues, we have ... human statues. Our are cooler, because they don't let pigeons do what pigeons do all over them.

• In addition to flagpoles, we also have plenty of stripper poles, which, in a weird way, makes us much more American than most cities.

— Originally published in Las Vegas Weekly.