The Elevator: Halloween edition

By Ron Kantowski (contact)

Saturday, Oct. 31, 2009 | 2 a.m.

A special Halloween edition of who’s going to the penthouse in local sports — and who’s getting the shaft:

TRICK

One stale Zagnut bar

To Mayor Oscar Goodman, who is and always will be the one Las Vegan I would most like to party with. That said, the next time he pitches an idea about a 20,000-seat downtown arena during an economy that is softer than the University of Florida’s nonconference football schedule, he must do it wearing fake nose and glasses, lest somebody take him seriously.

Two moldy popcorn balls

To Anschutz Entertainment Group, which, its Web site says, still plans to break ground on its world-class Las Vegas sports arena in summer 2008.

Three apples with worms

To the jokers at REI Neon who actually bristled when I expressed skepticism upon hearing its plan to build a downtown sports area. “That would have been a miracle for that deal to have ever gotten legs and taken off,” Mayor Goodman said this week. Now he tells me.

TREAT

One refrigerated Kit-Kat bar

To Las Vegas NBA replacement referees Deldre Carr and Tre Maddox, who did a nice job breaking up potential fisticuffs between the Lakers’ Lamar Odom and the Nuggets’ Chris Anderson before the contract dispute with the NBA and its zebras was resolved. Jim Buntin, the third member of the replacement crew, also helped, but he’s from the Bay Area so this elevator operator doesn’t really care that he did a nice job, too.

Two Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

To J.W. Hart, the former world champion bull rider, for telling like it is when asked about injuries to Kody Lostroh, who rode into the Thomas & Mack Center this week leading the Professional Bull Riders standings. “I don’t feel sorry for him,” Hart said, “because it’s the nature of the sport.” Hart backed off slightly by adding he felt badly that Lostroh “wasn’t 110 percent” for the finals, even though that’s impossible, because 100 percent is as healthy as one can get.

Three digitally remastered Bobby “Boris” Pickett “Monster Mash” CDs

To Las Vegas Top Fuel drag racer Rod Fuller, for literally talking trash. Fuller, who will be watching this weekend’s NHRA event at Las Vegas Motor Speedway from the suites due to lack of sponsorship, has joined forces with a recycling company that will pay race teams money back on their recyclable garbage. “It is our goal ... to fund my race team on trash,” he said. Just watch out for those stale Zagnut bars, Hot Rod. They’re harder to recycle than a John Force news conference transcript.