Beware the guru in your inbox

By Jeff Haney (contact)

Friday, Aug. 29, 2008 | 2 a.m.

As a gambling columnist, I’m not only the lucky recipient of foolproof roulette systems from every crackpot in the ... er, I mean from valued readers.

I’m also the beneficiary of come-ons from sports touts, especially this time of year as football season heats up.

For example, at the time of this writing, the result of Thursday night’s North Carolina State-South Carolina game was not known.

But I’m eager to learn of the outcome, because according to a helpful missive I received from one of those sports prognosticators peddling picks, the point spread on the game was a “Bookie Mistake.” The dispatch read in part, “Boys, the bookie has made a HUGE MISTAKE with this North Carolina State/South Carolina line! I can assure you that this line is WAY OFF, which means our Win (sic) is GUARANTEED!”

Yep, football season must be here.

And what exactly did this GUARANTEE entail?

Well, evidently if you bought the play on the “Bookie Mistake” game (for $45) and it lost, you’re still in luck. That’s right: “You will receive John’s Friday Night College Football Wise Guy Information Winner for Free!”

Sigh.

Later in the dispatch, which originated from somewhere on Las Vegas Boulevard South but offered no further details about its source, I was encouraged to pay $645 for “John’s Full Season College Football Package!”

This apparently includes “all of John’s ‘Special Plays’ such as, (sic) Parlay’s (sic), Game of the Week, Game of the Month’s (sic), and Game of the Year!”

In the bio section of this esteemed service’s Web site, we learn that John is “one of the most respected Professional Handicapper’s (sic) in the Industry (sic)” as well as “CO-owner (sic) of The University of Sports.”

I’m not making this up.

Also, “John is known for his Wise Guy Play’s (sic), 5-Unit Game of the Year’s (sic), and his very rare 3 Team Parlays!”

Not just rare. Very rare.

Still not making it up. But I wish I were.

Boys, if you think handing off your credit card number in exchange for football predictions is a prudent financial decision, I can assure you that your perception of reality is WAY OFF.

Boys, if you fall for these pitches, you’re just like the aforementioned bookie taking bets on N.C. State-South Carolina.

You’re making a HUGE MISTAKE.

Yankees prop

More than 85 years after Babe Ruth belted the first home run at Yankee Stadium, bettors in Las Vegas can wager on who will hit the final homer at the hallowed ballpark.

Alex Rodriguez was installed as a 5-2 favorite in the proposition at Lucky’s sports book at the Plaza, followed by Jason Giambi at 3-1 and a pair of Baltimore Orioles: Aubrey Huff (5-1) and Melvin Mora (6-1).

Bettors can also wager on 11 other players at odds of up to 50-1, plus a “field,” or all others, entry at 5-1.

It’s minus 160 (risk $1.60 to win $1) that a Yankee will hit the final homer, and plus 130 (risk $1 to net $1.30) it will not come from a Yankee.

No vig

The sports books at Fiesta Rancho and Fiesta Henderson are offering a strong promotion for football bettors, allowing gamblers to make bets with no “juice,” or vigorish, from 5 to 7 p.m. Sept. 4.

Under the “no juice” promotion, bettors can risk $1 for each $1 they’re trying to win, instead of laying the standard $1.10 for each $1 they’re trying to win.

Limits for the promotion are $3,000 on NFL sides and $1,000 on college football sides. Only straight bets qualify, and the “no juice” special does not apply to first-half wagers, halftime bets or parlays.