To watch or not to watch

By Ron Kantowski (contact), Mark Whittington (contact)

Friday, Aug. 8, 2008 | 2 a.m.

WHY I WILL BE WATCHING (Whittington)

1. The whole world is watching. Even when I lived abroad and watched soccer and snooker on TV, I kept hold of my American roots — scouring the Herald Tribune for baseball line scores, listening to scratchy Armed Forces Radio broadcasts of the World Series and trying to stay awake to watch the Super Bowl in the middle of the night. Still, the Summer Olympics make me feel like a citizen of the world — even if the Winter Games just leave me cold.

2. I can’t get enough of all the cool architecture that’s popped up in Beijing in the past seven years. I want to see the Bird’s Nest and the Water Cube filled with athletes and fans. I’m sure we’ll also see dozens of shots of other modern marvels, such as the Crisscross Z (the national TV headquarters), the Eggshell (national theater) and maybe even the new airport. And I thought all the construction on the Strip was crazy.

3. This is one time that swimming and track and field matter to me. The hype for these events borders on hysteria, but I’m ready to watch Michael Phelps, 41-year-old Dara Torres and all those Australians and Germans in the pool. I want to know if Tyson Gay or Usain Bolt is the world’s fastest human. My favorites are the athletes who can run, jump and toss: Can Brian Clay win gold in the decathlon? Will Hyleas Fountain and Jacquelyn Johnson medal in the heptathlon?

4. This will be the last year for softball at the Olympics. The U.S. women’s softball team is a real team — not a bunch of all-stars thrown together at the last minute. The Americans are going for their fourth consecutive gold medal. I’m ready to root for Lisa Fernandez, Monica Abbott and their teammates. It’s also the last year for Olympic baseball, but I’ll still get to watch Olympians Mike Koplove and Terry Tiffee at Cashman Field — at least until they get called up by the Dodgers.

5. All sports — even golf and NASCAR — look good in high definition. But the thrill of victory and agony of defeat at the Olympics looked good back in the days of black and white. NBC promises a thousand cameras beaming us thousands of hours of coverage on several channels — including a 24-hour HD channel. It should be spectacular and I can’t wait.

WHY I WILL NOT BE WATCHING (Kantowski)

1. It’s baseball season, the Cubs are in first place and Manny Ramirez is going yard for the Dodgers. Plus, you never know when Prince Fielder is going to punch one of his teammates in the dugout, and if you’re watching badminton, you might miss it.

2. Badminton is not a sport. It’s something you play in your back yard if it’s too small for volleyball. Or at a family reunion. Plus, it’s sort of embarrassing even asking the clerk at the sporting goods store for the equipment. You almost have to slide it in there when he’s not paying attention. “No, don’t need any help today, just browsing. On second thought, where do you keep the shuttlecocks?”

3. There’s only so much Bob Costas a person can take.

4. Up close and personal, or whatever NBC will call its behind-the-scenes stories about modern pentathletes from small countries on the Mediterranean you’ve never heard of who were discovered picking grapes. Everybody at the Olympics has a story. Just show me the games. Or horses jumping over stuff.

5. Jim McKay’s gone, Olga Korbut was charged with shoplifting, Teofilo Stevenson refused to turn pro, Nadia Comaneci got old and shows too much cleavage when she’s photographed, Rulon Gardner retired, Mark Spitz shaved his mustache, Bruce Jenner is more popular as a reality TV star than he was as a decathlete, Kerri Strug’s ankle healed, Marion Jones is in prison, Mary Decker no longer weeps, Zola Budd put on her shoes, Dan and Dave are now paying $79.95 for a pair of Reeboks like the rest of us and George Foreman’s little American flags have been replaced by lean mean grilling machines.