Ron Kantowski offers caution about the waving of Phantom Yellow

Thursday, May 3, 2007 | 7:24 a.m.

He just might be the hottest thing to hit the World Racin' Federation - I mean, NASCAR - since "Days of Thunder" and souvenir trailers.

But when we caught up to Phantom Yellow signing autographs at the recent Stroker Ace Charity Golf Tournament and Pork Rind Fry, he was kind enough to tell Ricky Bobby to get lost and grant this exclusive interview.

Q. While Tony Stewart and others are calling you a recent phenomenon, the fact is that Phantom Yellow is hardly a Johnny Come Lately now, is he?

I used to trade paint with Johnny Come Lately in the ARCA Series. But to answer your question, I've been around longer than Mark Martin and the grease under Chocolate Myers' fingernails. It's just that people really didn't start noticin' me until recently, when they started puttin' all the races on TV. Now, it seems whenever Earnhardt's kid falls a lap behind and it's gettin' near the end, one of them NASCAR boys is always callin' me.

How do they do that? Through your spotter or in-car radio?

Nope. They just use that yellow flag at the start-finish line. Sort of like when ol' Commissioner Gordon put out the bat signal to get hold of Batman. You can't miss it.

Unlike the so-called debris on the track. Isn't that the reason they display your flag, to warn drivers of potential danger?

(Cackling like Foghorn Leghorn). That's a joke, son. When were you born, yesterday? The reason they put out my flag is because without it, a lot of these races would be about as excitin' as watchin' paint dry, and then people watchin' at home would be changin' the channel to watch bowlin'.

But isn't that compromising the integrity of the sport? Putting out your flag just so everybody catches up to the leader and Dale Earnhardt Jr. can get his lap back? Or not throwing it, like at Daytona this year. Half of the field was crashing like a patient on "Grey's Anatomy," yet they let Kevin Harvick and Martin race all the way to the finish line.

This ain't golf, kid. We've been waitin' to get a network deal for almost 50 years. Rubbin' is racin'. So is makin' sure them network big shots are happy.

But I don't get it. When the Jets fall behind the Patriots 28-7, nobody throws a yellow flag and calls it 28-27.

That's why the bowlin' ratings are up in New York.

That's also why Tony Stewart compared it to rasslin'. I mean wrestling. Now you've even got me talking like you. But a lot of the other drivers have been saying that for years. And they didn't get called on to the carpet.

That's because Tony Stewart is from Indiana. He's an outsider. NASCAR would just as soon run him off and put another Dale or Rusty behind the wheel.

Tony Stewart also said NASCAR has been "playing God" by displaying your flag when he takes the lead at the end. Poor choice of words, right?

Right. He should have just said NASCAR is playing Dale Earnhardt. Then he might have gotten away with it.