John Katsilometes on why someone needs to pick up the spare even after winning this grand prize

Monday, March 19, 2007 | 7:23 a.m.

Imaginative self-promotion is Jeff Beacher's forte. Rudimentary mathematics are not.

As proof we detail the prize Beacher is offering the championship team in the new Beacher's Unprofessional Bowling Association (BUBA) at the Rio's Lucky Strike.

To the victors, Beacher is offering a trip for four to Atlantis in the Bahamas. Great!

Except, each league team has six players.

This would seem to be a problem in a league where even a disputed bar tab can spark a rhubarb. But Beacher is not concerned. I asked him about the 4/6 split at Thursday's grand opening, and he explained, "What it means is, two people get (to stay home and not win a trip to the Bahamas)."

Beacher's league launches tonight.

NoteMart

The Light Group is expanding its already formidable presence on the Strip with Diablo's Cantina, set to open by the fall in front of the Monte Carlo. Diablo's is to be an indoor-outdoor entertainment complex featuring Mexican food, a vast selection of cocktails, live entertainment and a "fun fiesta-like atmosphere." I'm thinking, tourists in sombreros. ...

Something is being planned for Celebrity nightclub on the corner of Third and Ogden streets in downtown Las Vegas, but whatever it is isn't entertainment. The place hasn't hosted a show in nearly two months and has been in the hands of the Lady Luck ownership group since Frederick Apcar sold it in June. No events are scheduled at Celebrity, according to the club's official Web site, and the place is sitting shuttered. ...

Not the man from Atlantis: A person who just radiates the goodness, eminent Las Vegas art collector and philanthropist-at-large Patrick Duffy, is leaving his community outreach position with Rhodes Homes. The magnanimous gala frequenter says he hasn't yet made plans for the future. As he said over the weekend, "I have no idea what I'm doing next, but Las Vegas a great place to not know that." ...

Donald Trump, whose Trump International on the Strip continues to push skyward, gave our president the what-fer Friday on CNN"s "Situation Room." Choosing his words with characteristic caution, Trump said, "Everything is a lie. It's all a big lie." ...

Bach on the air: One day KCNV 89.7-FM will have an emergency transmitter. But not yet. So today it relies on the transmitter on Mount Potosi, and it failed again Wednesday afternoon. KCNV and KNPR 88.9-FM Director of Broadcast Operations Phil Burger said power lines went down on the entire mountain Wednesday, then at around 7 p.m. the backup generator also failed. The station went to an all-static format until Thursday afternoon, when power was restored. Burger said a site for a new transmitter is still being surveyed.

The cost to install such a transmitter is $100,000, and cash-conscious National Public Radio is being pragmatic about where and when to place that piece of equipment. Until then, KCNV will be the valley's home to random static. ...

Season of Glass: While we're talking the talk, Dave Berns' guest on KNPR's "State of Nevada" today is Ira Glass, who will promoting his new Showtime series based on his NPR show, "This American Life," which debuts Tuesday. "State of Nevada" airs live at 10 a.m. and repeats from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. (Glass will be interviewed over the phone and not in the studio, so please, no stalking). ...

Block party: Opening on March 29 in Legoland in Carlsbad, Calif., is "Miniland Las Vegas." According to the Legoland Web site, more than two million bricks were used to build 10 hotels, a wedding chapel, monorail and intricate scenes showcasing the city (tiny Elvis figurines are part of the plan). ...

Tony? That you? Cohort passes along a plate on a Chevrolet SUV (believed to be an Avalanche), TOEKNEE.