What can be done to spark more interest in basketball’s Olympics qualifying tournament

Friday, Aug. 31, 2007 | 8:11 a.m.

Is it too late to add the Washington Generals to Uruguay's side of the bracket?

I'm not saying Team USA has had an easy go of it during the FIBA Americas Olympic basketball qualifying tournament at the Thomas & Mack Center. But the other night LeBron James called for the ball in the high post and faked out two Puerto Rican defenders by sticking the ball under his shirt, Meadowlark Lemon-style.

Somebody cue "Sweet Georgia Brown." What we need is 10 ways to make this tournament more interesting before Kobe Bryant and Carmelo Anthony reprise the old paper-in-the-water-bucket routine:

Rogue referee Tim Donaghy granted asylum in Argentina, Brazil, Canada, Mexico, Panama, Puerto Rico, the Virgin Islands, Uruguay and Venezuela.

Games between Team USA and the Spanish-speaking nations will consist of one - half of basketball and one - half of soccer.

Three-second lane on USA offensive end is converted into an alligator-filled moat.

Kobe Bryant forced to look at Mexican coach Nolan Richardson's coaching duds without protective goggles.

This just in: Uruguay hires Norman Dale as coach, perfects "Picket Fence" play.

In a variation of Little League's 85-pitch rule, Team USA must insert lineup composed of Eva Longoria, Herve Villechaize, Mary Lou Retton, Mickey from "Seinfeld" and Will Perdue any time it goes up by 30.

Mike Krzyzewski replaced as Team USA coach by actor Gabe Kaplan.

Somebody call Greece and tell them they got next.

Instead of admission to the Olympics, first- and second-place teams will be rewarded with admission to Olympic Garden gentlem en's club.

Differences in NBA and international rules explained to Team USA by Miss Teen South Carolina and White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen.