John Katsilometes describes an online diatribe by comic Alonzo Bodden, who says he’s not welcome at the Palms

Friday, Sept. 1, 2006 | 7:15 a.m.

Comic Alonzo Bodden begins his MySpace.com blog entry of Aug. 18 with, "Did I mention the Palms sucks?"

What follows, on that date and again in his musings of Aug. 20, is a lengthy, often funny and frequently profane diatribe against the Palms, from where Bodden says he has been banished.

The former "Last Comic Standing" champ was booked to perform two shows on Aug. 20 at The Lounge, as part of the Playboy Hollywood Comedy Tour showcases hosted by Paul Hughes and Cort McGowan. Bodden arrived on the evening of Aug. 17, expecting to have a room in his name reserved. Instead, he was told he wasn't expected until Friday afternoon - though he was booked for radio appearances Friday morning to promote his Saturday gig.

"My picture is on the billboard, my clip is on the TV screen right next to the check-in desk and no room," Bodden writes. "Well, I have this contract thing in my hands, you know it's written, and it says three nights."

Bodden says he was told to book a room at the Rio and pay for it himself. He bristled at that notion - "I'M (PROFANITY) WORKING HERE, I'M ON THE (PROFANITY) BILLBOARD," he writes - and finally a room was provided. "I don't ask much a smoking room with a king bed and a bottle of water. No green M&Ms, no Evian bath, no 'the crew can't look at me.' Give me a room and some water and I'll do the funny."

Bodden wasn't finished, not by a long shot. Still steaming by the time he took the stage on Aug. 20, he lit into the hotel for not having a room ready. For good measure, he also ripped the Maloofs (George owns the Palms) and Sacramento Kings (the family's NBA franchise). At the end of the set, Bodden writes, "three guys in black suits were waiting for me. I recognized them right away, as I've played them in movies and TV." It was a security team asking Bodden to leave the hotel at once. "They told me I was trespassing and I can never enter the Palms again. There goes my hosting the 'Real World' gig."

Bodden did apologize to fans who had tickets to the late show, and (in an attempt to leave at least one bridge uncharred) also said that Hughes is "a good guy, and Paul, if you read this I apologize to you also."

I ran all of this by Palms spokesman Larry Fink, who said, "We received numerous complaints from Mr. Bodden's fans, who were unimpressed by his performance."

NoteMart

On Thursday morning a mentally sharp and physically fit Jerry Lewis held his final news conference in advance of the "Jerry Lewis MDA Labor Day Telethon" at the South Coast ballroom, which will be the set for this weekend's show on KLAS Channel 8. One memorable line (amid several) from Lewis: "I think I've developed into a good man It's just when I see an incompetent person, I want to eat his lunch and rip his throat out I struggle with incompetence."

Lewis, 80, who for years has been a close friend of Michael Gaughan (who recently purchased the South Coast), is expected to announce that he has reached a 10-year deal to have the South Coast serve as the MDA telethon's headquarters. Lewis said he will return to the Orleans in six months to make up the dates he had to postpone when he suffered a mild heart attack in June

More from the Lewis presser: On hand was Channel 8's Gary Waddell, who will host the "cutaway" Las Vegas segments of the telethon with Paula Francis from the Las Vegas Hilton. Waddell has hosted the Las Vegas telethon telecast for 24 years, missing last year's show to file on-location reports during the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. In 1976 Waddell was a stage manager, working as a freelancer in Los Angeles, when Frank Sinatra brought Dean Martin onstage for the memorable reunion between Martin and Lewis. The two hadn't spoken since splitting in 1956 and, as Waddell said, "There were rumors about an hour before the show that Frank and Dean were going to show up. When it happened, you knew you were seeing history."

Pop artist Peter Max's brilliant Virtual Exhibition opens at 1 p.m. Saturday at the Art of Peter Max Gallery at the Forum Shops at Caesars. Guests can embark on a tour of Max's famed New York studio while checking out his artwork in the Vegas gallery

We have finally homed in on a month for the opening of "The Producers" at Paris Las Vegas. Tickets for shows in February go on sale at 9 a.m. Oct. 27 at the Paris Las Vegas box office

This week Las Vegas freelance journalist, podcaster and column frequenter Steve Friess and co-host Miles Smith (a producer at KVBC Channel 3) celebrate the one-year anniversary of The Strip (find it at www.thestrippodcast.com ) with an interview with George Maloof, who was the show's first guest when it launched a year ago

Greenspun Media Group (which is owned by the Greenspun family, which also owns the Sun) has launched LVM2Go, a packed-with-info guide to Las Vegas targeted at tourists. The guide is an offshoot of Las Vegas Magazine and hits the streets Sunday

Out on my feet: This column, and its author, are taking some time off. Not sure what I'm doing - either hitchhiking across the country or sequestering myself in the back yard pup tent - but I'll be off until Sept. 19

During a recent vacation to Michigan, a reader spotted this license plate on a new T-Bird: FNFNFN. And now I have a certain Beach Boys song going through my head.