Sunday, Feb. 26, 2006 | 8:21 a.m.
SOMEWHERE NEAR WINNE-MUCCA, ABOARD THE GIBBONS CAMPAIGN BUS - The media is crammed into the back of the bus, listening as the moderator, Jim Gibbons campaign guru Sig Rogich, begins the first gubernatorial debate featuring all five candidates.
Rogich: Thanks for being here on the Gibbons Express. Jim was happy to agree to this debate under the reasonable conditions we set forth: It had to be here on our bus, I had to moderate and Jim has to leave after his opening statement. All yours, Jim.
Gibbons: Thanks, Sig. I thought I told you to read my entire resume. But I digress. I'm Jim Gibbons and I'm running for governor. I have a vision for this state. I have plans for Nevada, big plans. I want to move this state into the future. I want to put education first and I want to finish first in this campaign. Thank you and now I am off to campaign. (The bus stops and Gibbons gets off.)
Rogich (tearing up): That was so beautiful and moving, Jim. Next up is Lt. Gov. Lorraine Hunt, who really has no chance, but we're glad she is here. Your opening statement, please.
Hunt: That's just not right, Sig. But I am happy to be here. I am happy in general. I don't know why. Maybe it's because Gov. Kenny Guinn says nice things about me. Did you know I was a heartbeat away from being governor? And I sat in on Cabinet meetings, and they were neat. And I have been in business, and I will be good for business. Thank you.
Rogich: Next up is Bob Beers. He wanted to debate Jim in all 17 counties, and that's where this bus is going. So as long as he stays on the bus, he will get his wish.
Beers: But will the congressman be back on the bus, Mr. Rogich?
Rogich: Well, no. He'll be hiding out in Winnemucca until November. But you seem to like to debate yourself, Senator, so go right ahead.
Beers: I have a vision just as Mr. Gibbons does. But my vision is about driving the Democrats crazy and passing the Tax and Spending Control initiative. I knew I should not have allowed George Harris to write it because it has had to be rewritten eight times. But we will get it right. I think. So vote for TASC. I mean, vote for me. Or even better, both.
Rogich: I think Jim has explained very well his position on TASC. He was for TASC before he was against it. Next up is Sen. Dina Titus. We in the Gibbons campaign love her and hope she wins the primary. Did I say that out loud, Senator?
Titus: Don't try to do that "she can't win a general" thing on me, Sig. They tried that with Perkins and look where he is now. I am in this to win, and I can win. I am for everything Jim Gibbons is not. In fact, I am for everything Jim Gibson is not. I can't even tell them apart, can you folks?
I'm a Democrat and yet I love the rurals. I'm a Southerner and I used to hate the North, but now I love it. And I love sayin' this because it sounds so good even though it has nothing to do with my legislative record: "Let's lock up the bad guys, educate our children, provide essential services and then get out of the way." Yes, that's me, Small Government Dina. Thank you.
Rogich: She is funny, isn't she ladies and gentlemen? And now, Jim Gibson, who I once almost persuaded to become a Republican. He really wanted to but couldn't pull the trigger. I hope that doesn't hurt you in a Democratic primary, mayor. Did the media hear that? (Chuckling) I didn't say that out loud, too, did I? Mayor, you're on.
Gibson: Thank you, Sig. I am not sure anyone exaggerates the way you do, Sig. I don't know why we are here. I don't mean here in Nevada or in the governor's race, although I don't think many people even know I am running. I mean on this bus. Why did we agree to this? Where is Gibbons? Why did we just let him get off the bus?
Anyhow, let me just distill my qualifications: Ran a city really well. Started an education program where kids read for millions of minutes. And I'm really thoughtful. Thank you.
Rogich: Thank you, Mayor and head of the monorail and tool of developers in Henderson. Was that out loud again? Darn. (Snickers). All right, it's time for questions from me. Wait, though.
There's Jim giving a speech on the steps of Winnemucca City Hall. I bet he's inspiring the crowd. I can't quite hear what he's saying, but the good thing is neither can anyone else here. Did I say that out loud? OK, everyone. Wave to Jim as the Gibbons Express goes by.
Jon Ralston hosts the news discussion program "Face to Face With Jon Ralston" on Las Vegas ONE and also publishes the daily e-mail newsletter "RalstonFlash.com." His column for the Las Vegas Sun appears Sunday, Wednesday and Friday. Ralston can be reached at 870-7997 or at [email protected].
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