Las Vegas Sun

March 28, 2024

Mother of Year a role model for parenting

Being a good mother sometimes means encouraging a child to fly from the nest, even in the face of great adversity.

Carol Ann Davis, 48, of Henderson, faced that situation five years ago when her eldest of five children, Mary Margret Davis Gunnell, now 25, was diagnosed with a brain tumor.

Davis, who is married to Dr. Steven Davis, a radiologist, visited her daughter in Provo, Utah, after receiving the devastating news.

"She told me she wanted to leave school and come home with me, but, although I was there to help her emotionally, I knew deep inside that what was best for her was to go on with her life, not hide away in her room," Davis said.

"She was facing her mortality, but I told her to be positive because God places these challenges in front of us. I didn't cry. I was strong for her. But when I got out on the highway by myself, I sobbed the whole way home."

Gunnell, whose paternal grandfather had died of a brain tumor, underwent surgery, survived, is cancer-free and has since given Davis two grandchildren.

Davis -- who also believes in spanking her children if necessary and in replacing television with family activities for an entire month each year -- is the Nevada Association of American Mothers Inc.'s 2005 Mother of the Year.

She went to Houston last week for the American Mothers national convention.

Also attending the event was Paula Ann Williams, 35, of North Las Vegas, who was selected by the same organization as the Nevada Young Mother for 2005.

Since 1935 the nonprofit, interfaith group has local chapters select the state mothers of the year. The group looks for mothers who are active in the community and a religious group and requires nominees to write their philosophy of parenting.

The winners spend the year lecturing to local groups on motherhood.

Davis, the organization's 50th Nevada Mother of the Year, grew up in Utah, the lone girl among three children.

"Like most little girls, I played with dolls and stuffed animals and cuddled all of the poor kittycats in our home -- preparing for eventual motherhood," she said. "My mother (Mary Brown, now of Claremont, Calif.) was a full-time mom and a great role model for me."

Still, her parents encouraged Davis to excel in school and have it all -- motherhood and a career. Davis attended Brigham Young University, and so did her daughter Mary. Two of her other children now attend the university.

Davis later earned a bachelor of science degree in dental hygiene at the University of Southern California, where she met Steven, then a medical student. They married in 1978.

Carol Davis has for years worked part time as a local dental hygienist, noting the flexible hours have afforded her the opportunity to be a full-time mom like her mother.

In addition to raising her children, Davis also has a resume filled with community service and charity work that includes activities through the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and with the PTA.

She has delivered meals to the aged and poor and taught piano in schools.

In addition to her oldest daughter, a BYU graduate and nurse, Davis has two other daughters and two sons: 23-year-old Stephanie Ann, a second-year BYU law student; 20-year-old Kathryn Michelle, a BYU senior majoring in speech pathology; 17-year-old John Arnold, a senior at Coronado High; and 13-year-old Brian Steven, an eighth grader at Greenspun Junior High.

"My mom deserves to be mother of the year because I think she is an ideal mom," Stephanie said, tears flowing down her cheeks.

"I did not realize how much my mother did for me while I was growing up, but I do now. I see her now as a brilliant, beautiful woman who has touched so many lives. In some ways, she is overdue for this honor."

Kathryn echoed that sentiment, occasionally dabbing her moistening eyes with a tissue: "If I came home from school and had had a bad day she was always there to help me through with a big hug. And she listened to what I had to say.

"She is a perfect example of strength and of service to her family and her community."

Kathryn recalled when she and her sister were very young they stained the walls of the living room with blue Crest toothpaste. She said they were abruptly sent to their rooms, where they planned further mischief out of mom's sight.

But, they said, if they were really bad, they got spanked.

Despite some child development experts discouraging that practice, Davis says that corporal punishment is sometimes necessary.

"There is nothing wrong with a little pat on the back -- low enough, and hard enough -- so yes, I have spanked my children," she said. "I feel it is a mother's responsibility to encourage proper behavior. You find out what works for you, and I've found sometimes that (spanking) works."

Davis' kids said Mom did not have to spank them often, noting that the fear of getting a rump warming encouraged them to toe the line.

Also, while the children were growing up, Davis had a rule that each September, when school started up, there was no TV, no videos, no movies and no video games for that month.

"Instead, we read, exercised, practiced the piano -- we filled the time doing things with each other as a family," Davis said. "The rule applied not only to the kids, but also to my husband and I. And that meant not watching the late night news after the kids went to bed."

Susan Leavitt, president-elect of the Nevada Association of American Mothers and last year's Nevada Mother of the Year, said Davis and Williams represent what being a mother is all about.

"The purpose of recognizing mothers is to help everyone understand the importance of motherhood and the importance of family," Leavitt said. "Carol and Paula exemplify all mothers who strengthen the moral and spiritual foundations of home and family."

Williams and her husband, attorney Donald "Butch" Williams, have six children: Tyson, 15, a ninth grader at Mojave High; Kayla, 13, an eighth grader at Cram Middle School; and Zachary, 11, a fifth grader; Haylee, 9, a third grader; Joshua, 7, a first grader; and Alexa, 5, a kindergarten student, all at Lee Antonello Elementary school.

"Nurturing children is the most important job mothers have," Williams said. "The greatest joys in my life are my children."

That, Davis agrees, is a feeling that a mother should always express.

"My advice to other mothers would be to find your joy and share it with your children. Savor it. In not too many years all of my children will be out of my home. But I will always be a mother."

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