Friday, Jan. 7, 2005 | 3:38 a.m.
WEEKEND EDITION
January 8 - 9, 2005
Who: Lewis Black with John Bowman.
When: 7 p.m. Friday and Saturday.
Where: House of Blues at Mandalay Bay.
Tickets: $27-$42.
Information: 632-7600.
Hushed whisper?
It's not the kind of answer I expected when Lewis Black answered his Florida hotel room phone.
After all, this is the comedian best known for his weekly red-faced, finger-waving political rants and biting social commentary on "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart."
Where was the excitement? Where was the emotion? Where was the trademark bark?
As it turned out, Black, 56, was being considerate. He and a friend spent three hours on a golf course roasting in the Fort Lauderdale sun, and now his pal was fast asleep.
Once Black called on his cell phone from outside of the room, the comedian was his normal self, that is to say intelligent, brash and indignant of perceived idiocy.
With a two-night stand scheduled for Friday and Saturday at the House of Blues at Mandalay Bay, the Las Vegas Sun recently talked to Lewis about the holidays, the Democrats and his soon-to-be-released autobiography, "Nothing's Sacred."
The rant began, simply enough, after a traditional holiday gesture ...
Las Vegas Sun: Happy New Year.
Lewis Black: Oh yeah, happy, happy. Things have really changed. I never understood the concept of New Year. You know, it's like, "You think it's going to get better? How delusional are you?" It's a fake demarcation of time.
Sun: I guess you didn't make any New Year's resolutions.
LB: No, I stopped doing that because three days later you just feel like a failure. Three days into the New Year you haven't done anything you said you were going to do.
Sun: Were you stressed out by the holidays, then?
LB: I kind of ignore them. I'm Jewish, so I don't have to deal with a lot of what the Christian end of the community is going through. I'm not stressed out, but I get tired of "Little Drummer Boy." How many times can you hear it? And every year, Christmas just takes longer. I don't know how long it takes you Christians to shop, but it's out of control.
Sun: After nearly three decades of stand-up, you're hardly an overnight success story. Does having that success take longer make it more enjoyable?
LB: I think so. I'm thrilled with it. I'm surprised people recognize me, especially out of context. I'm wandering around southern Florida and people walk up and go,"Hi, how're you doing?" It's kind of amazing that medium. I consider myself very lucky. There are lots of extremely funny people out there who have not been given their due.
Sun: Why did you get lucky?
LB: Conan (O'Brien) helped. I did a lot of "Conan" and they liked me. And by the time I went on "Conan" I had a ton of material nobody had ever heard, so I could go on again and again and again. And "The Daily Show" ... there's five or six or seven, maybe 10 people, who could have done "Weekend Update," the "SNL" thing. And since that didn't happen with me ... I was very lucky because "The Daily Show" needed somebody to come on once a week and talk and yell and scream for three minutes.
Sun: Something you already had experience with.
LB: Yeah. It's not just political, it's social commentary. They knew I could come up with 2-3 minutes a week.
Sun: Do you ever have a problem coming up with the material?
LB: It's easy. I mean, it's not easy, but every time you panic they come up with 500 other things. Then they come up with abstinence. What century am I in? They didn't even try to pull that (expletive) when I was in school. I mean, seriously.
You watch the rates of pregnancy rise and other kids are (having sex) and you refuse to do the right thing. Live in denial, that's fine. Let's go back, it's going to be 1956 forever.
Sun: You've played Las Vegas several times in your career. Any moments that stick out in your mind?
LB: I've not really good at figuring out who the hookers are. I was at the Trop one night, I'd worked at the Comedy Stop, and was sitting at the bar playing video poker. We would generally hang around there. I just remember one night, this woman was staring at me. And she was stunning. Then she came over and sat down next to me. She said, "Would you like to have a good time?" I said, "Of course." She said, "It will cost you." I had no idea. I was shocked. So I said, "You mean, you don't like me for myself?"
Sun: How was it to write your new book?
LB: It was horrifying. It eventually became a certain amount of fun, but I was writing it while I was touring, so I was listening to myself all the time. I was getting to the point where I was going, "Shut the (expletive) up!" You get a little tired of yourself.
I wished I had more time to write the book. The book came out better than I thought but not as good as I would have liked.
Sun: How long did it take you to write it?
LB: About six or seven months.
Sun: And it's all autobiographical?
LB: It's about three-quarters autobiographical and then stand-up as it fits. It's a mix of older and newer stand-up or things that I know people have not heard but to situations that apply to my bio, so it kind of gives people somewhat of a sense of where my humor comes from.
Sun: What did you learn about yourself in writing your autobiography?
LB: One of the main things I discovered is that I don't seem to have a memory. (Laughs) It's not as good as I thought it was. I ended up having to call people, I go, "What the (expletive) happened? What were we doing?" That's what I wrote in the beginning. I said, "I'd call it a memoir, but I don't have a memory."
Sun: What are your thoughts on last year's presidential election?
LB: When you have two candidates -- one who took us to war, the other one who voted for war -- then where's the candidate? You have to have another choice. I think, ultimately, that's why Kerry lost. For all the other excuses they could give, I think when you've got somebody who created the war and somebody who voted for the war, it's tough for the person who voted for the war to then back off the war.
As soon as the Democrats did not take a stand, they lost the next four years. That's what you do. That's your job. Newspapers are supposed to be adversarial and the Democrats are supposed to be adversarial. But they are such (wimps). They didn't have to go crazy. They could have said, "OK, what's the plan?" That's the question they had to ask. They had no plan. Not one of those jackasses asked what the plan was except for Sen. Robert Byrd (D-W.Va.), who everybody thinks is stark-raving mad.
Sun: So you were disenchanted with both candidates?
LB: I think if you're inspired by either candidate you need severe psychiatric care. And I'm really serious about it. If you've reached the point that these people inspire you, then you've lost any sense of hope or knowledge of what real leadership is. Real leadership is supposed to inspire someone. All those debates inspired me to do was to buy an SUV and try to run over myself.
This isn't funny anymore. Either they're crazy or I'm crazy, and I'm not crazy. How do you send guys to war without the proper equipment and remain in office? Or, you remain the secretary of state? How? How is that possible? Is everybody deaf?
Sun: Do you ever feel that no one listens to you?
LB: I feel that people hear me. I think there's a common shared sense of frustration and there's a certain amount of comfort in that. At least, somebody gets the joke. I would feel more psychotic if I were telling the joke and everybody was staring at me. (Laughs)
Sun: I guess it's easy, sometimes, to lose hope and simply throw your hands in the air and say, "The world is going to hell in a handbasket."
LB: And that's sometimes what I feel like. But I feel like I have this sadly pathetic faith in the human spirit and the overriding intelligence of the American people, not their leadership.
I wouldn't be up there standing, yelling and screaming if I didn't have hope. But it's not like on any given night I feel the blind will see and the crippled will walk.
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