Thursday, Dec. 29, 2005 | 8:11 a.m.
Ron Kantowski's column appears on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Reach him at [email protected] or (702) 259-4088.
It must have been 10 years ago when I was using the men's room at the old Sun building on Valley View and bumped into a guy who could have passed for Mike Tyson's twin brother.
We didn't shake hands. For lots of reasons.
Cliff Couser claims to be Iron Mike's half-brother, which, for purposes of this column, is close enough. Couser says they have the same mother, different fathers. Other than that, about the only thing he says about Tyson is they don't talk.
And that he'd like to fight him someday.
At 34 and with a record of 30-10 with 20 knockouts (he says, although the Sun archives indicate 24-9 is closer to the truth) that's still a possibility.
In boxing, anything is possible.
That's why Couser says he is launching a comeback in Biloxi, Miss., on Jan. 14. He said it is a tuneup fight against a 6-foot-6 guy named Williams.
While there probably are a lot of 6-foot-6 guys named Williams running around Mississippi's Gulf Coast, most probably have headed for higher ground. The last time anybody checked, Biloxi was still pretty waterlogged from Hurricane Katrina.
But when I called Couser back, he insisted the fight was on. Even if none of the fight schedules (which, it should be noted, are only slightly more accurate than a Big Lots! watch) list it.
As I said, in boxing, anything is possible, especially when colorful Cliff Couser is involved.
To wit, Couser was training for a fight against Willie Chapman in Uzbekistan (hey, sometimes you gotta look for a fight) in 2001 when he claims to have bumped into Osama bin Laden while jogging.
Check that. In boxing, almost anything is possible.
"I was out running about 3 or 4 in the morning and I saw this real tall guy who had four or five people around him. He was wearing white and had a hairy face," Couser said at the time.
I might have told him there are a lot of tall hairy guys wearing white with entourages walking around the Middle East, even at 3 a.m. But then why spoil a good story?
"I didn't know it until later when I got back to the United States and saw a picture of him, but that was bin Laden," Couser said. "I'm very serious."
In that Couser's right hand is better than mine, who am I to disagree?
That's why when the phone rings and the guy on the other end sounds sort of like Mike Tyson, you can't help but listen.
Besides that alleged chance meeting with bin Laden and his alleged bloodline to Tyson, Couser's biggest brush with fame was being stopped by Lance Whitaker inside of five rounds in 2002. He hasn't fought since 2003, when he was disqualified after body-slamming Malcolm Tann to the canvas in Rancho Mirage, Calif.
That's right, body-slamming. Would you expect anything else from Tyson's alleged half-brother?
It was a bizarre incident, even for boxing, as a wire service story claimed Couser "punched, wrestled and perhaps bit" his opponent, who had been rabbit punching him. Couser said he is controlling his mood swings with Prozac these days.
Up to a point, anyway.
"I want to hit him like I've never hit anyone," Couser said about getting a rematch with Tann. "I want to rape his soul with every punch. I want to brain damage him with my fists."
Hmmm.
I'm not a doctor. I have never played one on TV. And I didn't stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
But I think it might be time for Couser to increase the strength of that prescription just a tad.
Ron Kantowski can be reached at 259-4088 or at [email protected].
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