Family of fallen LV Marine in dispute over burial site

Stephen Curran

Wednesday, Nov. 17, 2004 | 11:08 a.m.

A Las Vegas mother grieving the loss of her son in Iraq is now in a bitter dispute with her ex-husband over where the young Marine will be buried.

Marine Lance Cpl. Nicholas Anderson, who died Friday in Iraq's Al Anbar Province, left a will stating that he wanted his father to handle funeral arrangements in the event of his death.

His father, Albert Anderson, lives in Ventura, Calif., and wants his son buried in California.

His mother, Eleanor Andrea Dachtler, wants him buried in Las Vegas, where he lived with her since he was 3 years old.

The Defense Department has ordered Nicholas Anderson's body to stay in Washington, D.C., until a hearing today confirms which parent has the final say. His funeral is tentatively scheduled for Saturday in either California or Las Vegas, Dachtler said.

The decision rests on the military's interpretation of a Defense Department regulation that gives the final say to the older parent, in this case Albert Anderson, if the mother and father cannot agree about funeral arrangements, according to the regulation.

"It's like everything's up in the air right now," a weary-sounding Dachtler said. "If the ruling goes with how the senior parent wants it, we'll have to fly to California."

Since their son's death, Dacthler and her ex-husband have communicated only through Albert Anderson's lawyer, she said.

Dachtler contacted the Marines after a phone call from Rep. Shelley Berkley, D-Las Vegas, who is now acting as a liaison between Nicholas Anderson's family and the military, Berkley's spokesman, David Cherry, said.

Cherry, citing confidentiality regulations governing what is said in private between Berkley and a constituent, would not specify what she told Dachtler.

"As you can imagine, the military has a process and we're just making sure she (Dachtler) has an advocate in that process," Cherry said. "We're doing everything we can and, obviously, this is a time when the family is dealing with the loss of a loved one."

According to the regulation, parents of unmarried soldiers "in order of seniority" automatically have rights to make funeral arrangements. By that rule, Albert Anderson apparently has an equal say in his son's burial because he shared joint custody with his son's mother.

Cherry said a military judge's determination will hinge on the interpretation of the law. Does it mean the older parent has the final word no matter what, or does it give greater weight to the parent who had primary custody when the Marine was a minor, as Dachtler said she had?

Nicholas Anderson, 19, graduated from Bonanza High School in 2003. He was not married and listed his mother and father as emergency contacts on pre-deployment paperwork, Dachtler said. Albert Anderson could not be reached for comment Tuesday. His sister-in-law, Brenda Smith, said the funeral is expected to be held in California. Smith said she did not know of the dispute with Dachtler.

As for the dispute involving Dachtler, "We know nothing about that," Smith said.

Sgt. Colin Wyers, a spokesman at Camp Pendleton in California, where Nicholas Anderson's battalion was based, said Marines preparing for deployment are urged to fill out a will or power of attorney before they leave. In addition, they must also update a record of emergency data, which includes contact information for friends or family members, he said.

Wyers said he did not know of a regulation that dictated what happens if parents of a fallen Marine cannot agree on burial arrangements.

"I have never heard anything like that," Wyers said. "It doesn't sound right."

Marines are not required to fill out a will or power of attorney. The paperwork is more common among older Marines, many of whom opt for the power of attorney to establish provisions for their children, Wyers said.

The paperwork is one in a series of preparations a Marine must make before leaving the country. In addition to picking up extra gear needed for their assignment, each man and woman serving must undergo a physical examination and update their immunizations and must make arrangements to pay their bills while they are away, Wyers said.

Flags outside Bonanza High School flew at half-staff today and a memorial service is scheduled for 1 p.m. today, Dachtler said.