Tuesday, March 23, 2004 | 10:40 a.m.
"It is hard to check the dental records without a head."
Now there's a good horror-movie line.
It is one of many pleasingly awful lines in "The Cauldron: Baptism of Blood," the latest release from Las Vegas filmmaker and genre favorite Ted V. Mikels.
The entertaining flick premiered before a boisterous, standing-room-only crowd at the Brenden Theatres at the Palms on Sunday night.
The tale of sorcery, witchcraft, satanic ritualism, black magic and paranormal behavior also features an extended cameo by former Lt. Gov. Lonnie Hammargren.
"What can I say? Everyone wants to be in pictures," Mikels told us at the afterparty at his studio, near Industrial Road and West Hacienda Avenue.
In the film, Stacy (Kellie Karl) wins an "American Idol"-type singing contest and is promptly kidnapped by scantily clad followers of the dastardly Coven Witch (Justine Baker).
Can Stacy's husband (Tom Lynch) save her before she is indoctrinated into the cult via a blood ritual?
We aren't telling.
Mikels has made nearly 100 movies in a career that dates to the mid-1950s. He has often financed them by producing commercials, working with everyone from Joe DiMaggio to the Smothers Brothers.
Many of Mikels' films, while remaining firmly in the B-grade horror realm, offer some biting social commentary. Some examples are, "I Crossed the Color Line," which is about an interracial marriage; the spy spoof "Agent from H.A.R.M." and the psychedelic-era parody "Girl in Gold Boots."
"Cauldron" is being released on video and DVD and is available at video stores or at tedvmikels.com.
Disneyland?
You've just helped authorities nail one of the nation's most hunted fugitives, the alleged Ohio sniper, Charles McCoy.
Your name is in every paper in the country and you are called a hero.
What are you going to do now?
Conrad Malsom went to see "Ba-Da-Bing."
On Sunday night Malsom and pal Tom Smith attended the interactive dinner theater show at the Ovation Theatre (Desert Passage at Aladdin).
They had the veal scallopini and told the cast afterward that they enjoyed it immensely -- the show, that is. But they said the food was pretty good, too.
Over easy
A couple of big society breakfasts are being served up Wednesday.
The Arthritis Foundation of Southern Nevada is hosting a private meal at the Four Seasons to map out details and firm up a date for its upcoming fund-raising walk.
And the Legacy Society, which supports the Boys & Girls Clubs of Las Vegas, is having a "Breakfast at Tiffany's" event at Bellagio.
It will be showing off a new jewelry collection and raffling keys to open gold padlocks that have been secured to blue Tiffany gift boxes.
Couple
Chamber of Commerce prez Kara Kelley and Lionel Sawyer & Collins law firm partner Paul Larsen were married Sunday at the Ritz-Carlton, Lake Las Vegas.
They met in the Leadership Las Vegas class of 1998, and were married by another classmate, Judge Jennifer Togliatti.
Other guests included MGM MIRAGE exec Punam Mathur; Lt. Gov. Lorraine Hunt's communications director and radio host Ira David Sternberg and his Boyd gaming exec wife, Gina Polovina; Lesley Pittman of Station Casinos; Bob and Linda Faiss; and Sam and Mary Ellen McMullen.
The new couple are on a honeymoon across California.
Speed racer
A new fan-driven radio show devoted to motor sports debuts tonight on the Las Vegas airwaves.
C.N. "Big Mack" McPhaul, a Vegas-based ABC and CNN Radio producer, is the creator and host of "The Real Las Vegas Motorsports Show."
"What makes this different is that it is all about the fans -- men and women," McPhaul told us. "Whatever the fans want, that's what we'll do. We will also talk with broadcasters and writers, and we have imbeds at venues around the country talking about events from the inside. We want controversy!"
The weekly one-hour show airs at 9 p.m. Tuesdays on KLAV 1230-AM.
VegasBits
Shopper: Caesars Palace headliner Elton John was spotted the other day at Family Music, next to Trader Joe's on Sunset Road off Green Valley Parkway. He was checking out the pianos and some other instruments. Maybe he was looking for a birthday present for himself? Sir Elton turns 57 on Thursday ...
Scene: Robin Leach and the twin Playboy models Jocelyn and Crystal Potter (fresh off a morning Howard Stern appearance) were snuggling together at the "Rent" afterparty at Prana (Desert Passage at Aladdin) on Friday night ...
Appear: Rap icon Darryl McDaniels -- the latter part of hip-hop forerunners RunDMC -- will be performing at Bikini's (Rio) April 3. He'll do some old-school favorites with DJ Hurricane from the Beastie Boys ...
Farewell: Phil Collins has announced a few dates of his "First Final Farewell Tour" (Anaheim in August, New York and Chicago in September). A Vegas date is a certainty, we hear, and will be announced once venue details are sorted out ...
Add: Joe Pantoliano (the late Ralphie Cifaretto from "The Sopranos") is set to join the cast of "Dr. Vegas," the new series that stars Rob Lowe as a casino doc. Pantoliano's "The Handler" was canceled this season, as was Lowe's "Lyon's Den" ...
Material sale: Tickets for Madonna's May 29 MGM Grand concert go on sale Saturday. Tickets are priced from $75 to $350 ...
More tour: Rush, the epic rock trio, will entertain fans throughout North America when they hit the road for a 30th Anniversary Tour this summer. They play the MGM Grand Garden Arena July 17. Tickets are priced from $40 to $95 and go on sale Friday.
The tour has been planned even as the band's lead guitarist was charged Monday with two counts of battery, more than three months after a New Year's Eve scuffle with sheriff's deputies at a Naples, Fla., hotel.
Deputies said the fight started when the guitarist's son refused to get off the stage at The Ritz-Carlton, where the house band was performing.
Alex Zivojinovich, whose stage name is Alex Lifeson, tried to intervene when deputies escorted his son off the property, deputies said. They accused Rush's founding member of pushing a female deputy down a stairwell and spitting in another deputy's face ...
Changes: Last year, we'd almost have to stop the presses. Now, when Ben Affleck is spotted playing poker at Bellagio and then partying at Light, as he was over the weekend, it just merits a few lines at the bottom of a gossip column.
From Sun wires
Franklin hospitalized: Aretha Franklin, 61, has been hospitalized for an undisclosed ailment and is in stable condition, her publicist said Monday.
The Queen of Soul, who lives in Detroit, was hospitalized Saturday, the publicist said.
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