Where I Stand — Mike O’Callaghan: Ruthe lives in us all

Thursday, Feb. 19, 2004 | 9:35 a.m.

Brian Greenspun is editor of the Las Vegas Sun.

MEMO TO Ruthe Deskin:

It is Thursday, Feb. 19, and the state of Nevada and this city you loved so much are sad and very different places. It is sad because you are no longer here. It is different because you are no longer here.

But, while we mourn your loss, there is a sense of good feeling that embraces us, Ruthe. You see, for those of us at the Las Vegas Sun, in the newsroom especially, you are not really gone, because everything you have taught us is embedded in the very fabric of our newspaper. Every lesson, every critique, every word, good and bad, that you uttered throughout your half century as a leader here, which made this a great newspaper and the Sun an even better place to work, lives on. As it should be and as you would insist.

I know, Ruthe, that brevity was always your strong suit and I will try to make this memo fit the limited time you might indulge us for this kind of farewell. There are just a few things I would like to share with the people here so that they may better know the Ruthe Deskin who made all of us so much better people for knowing you.

I would like to thank you, Ruthe, for the unending help you gave me. Even when I knew you had far better and more productive things to do, you always took the time to listen to what I wrote, to edit when necessary -- which was often -- and to direct me along a path that you believed would get me where I was heading with much less difficulty, in a more understandable way and in far fewer words. Heck, Ruthe, not just me, you did that for every young person who sought your guidance and advice.

I am sure I am not telling these people anything they didn't know about you when I suggest that, despite your open-mindedness as a column writer, you were always pretty much the prude. One story my mother loves to tell was that time when my father was running for governor of Nevada. His campaign staff was three deep. The candidate, his wife and the only person who had a clue about what was going on in Nevada. You. Oftentimes, you three would end up in some small town for the night -- that would have been just about anyplace in Nevada other than Reno and Las Vegas. One night there was not a room to be found. let alone two. You worked a little magic and managed one room and a king size bed. My mother -- acting as a wife and a very good friend -- preserved family harmony by sleeping between you and my dad in this one big bed. Hank was up, dressed and out very early the next morning. When you awoke, there you were, resplendent in your nightgown, your robe and your pearl necklace a! nd earrings, which you refused to take off the night before. My mother couldn't believe you slept so formally. We know what that was about, though, don't we. Pearls are just one way a lady from Pizen Switch could preserve her modesty and respectability through the night!

As for your grit, I will never forget the time in 1963 when the Sun burned to the ground. My parents were out of the country, unable to get back for a couple of days. You pulled the Sun out from the ashes, grabbed hold of the reins and the staff and never missed an edition. You turned your house and garage into a newsroom and production facility and the Sun kept shining. It would not be here today but for you, Ruthe. And Las Vegas would be a very different and far less attractive place to live.

In fact, if it weren't for your wit, your wisdom and your down-home logic, I am pretty sure the Sun would not have made it. Someone had to provide balance to Hank Greenspun's passion. Someone had to make sure common sense had a seat at the publisher's table. It took both you and my mother, and I know it wasn't easy, but the two of you managed to keep his feet close enough to the ground to allow you to steer a proper course for Las Vegas' newspaper of conscience.

You know, Ruthe, there is no way I can talk about your life in better or more descriptive terms than Ed Koch managed to capture in his front page story when you left us. Or to match the depth of emotion reached by Susan Snyder, John Katsilometes or Jeff German in their reactions. What I can do is look out across this room and see the hundreds of people whose lives you touched so deeply and know that they represent thousands of Nevadans whose lives were made better because you cared.

More than anyone I know, you gave of yourself for people you didn't know but who you did know would not have a chance to succeed unless you entered the fray. And when you did get involved, you did it your way. Short, sweet and to the point.

The point, is the key word. You knew how to use words in a way that never left any room for misunderstanding. Whether it was some lofty political figure, a nine-to-five bureaucrat or some business person working overtime to take advantage of a little guy, your words, your style and your insistence that the right thing be done always carried the day.

And by the way, I know I thanked you a hundred times, but thanks once more to you and your dear Jim, for teaching me how to bowl. The hours the three of us spent at the brand new Showboat Bowling Lanes and before that at the old lanes downtown, were some of my best times as a young boy. The time you spent with me was indicative of the time you had for every young person who crossed your path or even caught your sight. And, especially, those who you did not know but who you knew needed help because no one else made the effort. You did. And there are thousands of young people in this valley whose lives have been enriched and made better because you took the time.

In the end, Ruthe, I know you were happy to be back in your own home, with your daughters, Nancy and Terry, the rest of your family and your cat. Ah, yes, your animals. No one could ever write about animals the way you could. I am sure, in large part, your were the inspiration for my sister's commitment to man's best friends, all their friends, and all theirs! People who were mean to people, that upset you. But, people who were mean to animals, those folks got no mercy from Ruthe Deskin.

Those of us who knew you were never surprised at the depth of your caring, Ruthe. When your illness was creating daily and difficult challenges, it was your e-mails and your phone calls about my mother's health that provided my family with great perspective. Just like you always did.

I know that when my mom came to see you in the hospital, even though you had difficulty showing your love, your reaction meant the world to all of us. You have been family not only to the Greenspuns, but also to everyone at the Sun, everyone in this room and to a city, most of the residents of which may never know the incredible contributions you have made to make this a wonderful place and their lives so much better. We could have easily gone the other way but for you.

I know I speak for all of us when I tell you how sad we are that you are gone. We will miss your good counsel, your good sense and your good humor. That combination is hard to find these days, especially from someone who gave it so selflessly. But I also know that I speak for an entire state when I tell you that we are all so much better for the fact that you were here. You lived, you loved and you cared, Ruthie D. We already miss you.

As ever, Brian.

P.S. We love you, too.

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