‘We Will Rock You’ a greatest-wit collection at Paris

Friday, Aug. 27, 2004 | 8:47 a.m.

In the distant future a muscular black male punk rocker sporting a mohawk is named Britney Spears.

Spears' girlfriend is a gorgeous blonde rocker named Ozzy Osbourne.

They are part of a waning tribe of Bohemians trying to keep rock 'n' roll alive, but more than 300 years have passed since the music was outlawed, and their scant knowledge of the era is pieces of information passed down over the generations.

The Bohemians have adopted rock 'n' roll names, but the names have no meaning to them. They only know that one day The Dreamer, The King -- a messiah figure -- one day will appear and lead them.

"We Will Rock You," the musical comedy that premiered this week at Paris Las Vegas, not only will rock you with some of Queen's most popular songs but will also entertain you with a witty script by Ben Elton.

The production was first staged in London two years ago, becoming one of that city's most popular shows. There's a good possibility that it may experience the same success in Las Vegas, where it has made its North American debut.

"We Will Rock You" runs an hour and 50 minutes without an intermission, but it moves so quickly and smoothly and is so much fun that one loses track of time.

The story opens with Pop sitting onstage, surrounded by rays of light that creates a laser jail cell. He talks to the audience.

"I still ain't found out the exact day that the music died," he says, "But TAmerican Idol' had a whole lot to do with it."

The show is perfectly cast with performers who have tremendous vocal talent, especially Rich Hebert, who does an outstanding job as the antagonist, Khashoggi, and Patti Russo as the Killer Queen, who is trying to stamp out live music forever.

Tony Vincent, who portrays Galileo (The Dreamer destined to save rock), and Aspen Miller (female protagonist Scaramouche) are excellent in their respective parts.

Douglas Crawford does a lot with his small-but-pivotal role as "Pop," a librarian who retains much of the knowledge about rock 'n' roll in his head, since all of the books and magazines on the subject have been destroyed.

Crawford most recently performed at the Paris in 2000, appearing as Quasimodo in the short-lived production of "Notre Dame de Paris." He can unpack his bags now. "We Will Rock You" should be here for a long run.

The sets are spectacular, the costumes interesting, the overall production almost flawless.

Like "Mamma Mia!" at Mandalay Bay (based on music by ABBA), "We Will Rock You" uses songs by one of the hottest bands of the '70s and early '80s to weave a light-hearted tale that should appeal to the broadest fan base. Who doesn't like rock 'n' roll, especially the older stuff?

The production opens with a three-piece set that includes "Radio Ga Ga" (a 1984 hit), "I Want to Break Free" ('84) and "Somebody to Love" ('76).

The final scene is another three-piece set: "We Will Rock You" ('77), "We are the Champions" ('77) and "Bohemian Rhapsody" ('75).

In between there are a dozen more Queen numbers, among them "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" ('79), "Fat Bottomed Girls" ('78) and "Another One Bites the Dust" ('80).

There have been some adaptions made for Vegas audiences -- for example, when Galileo and Scaramouche begin their search for a specific guitar, the last remaining musical instrument in the world, the journey first takes them to Vegas, a city that has long been almost entirely submerged in water, an effect of global warming.

When the couple arrive at a Vegas lounge they meet Pop and a handful of zombie-like Bohemians, who have had their minds altered by the establishment.

From Vegas the search for the holy grail of instruments takes them to Graceland, a decaying mansion in Memphis that has lost meaning over the centuries.

Elton's cleverly written satire is reminiscent of George Orwell's "1984" and Aldous Huxley's "Brave New World," with a hint of Anthony Burgess' "Clockwork Orange" thrown in for good measure.

Elton uses the idea of mind control by mainstream society to get at the heart of what rock 'n' roll was all about at its inception: rebellion against the establishment.