Columnist Susan Snyder: We’re one nation, under what?

Friday, March 7, 2003 | 3:29 a.m.

The mail is going to be awful, but I cannot help myself.

Perhaps the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals simply needs a suggested substitute for the "under God" part of the Pledge of Allegiance, which according to the court's ruling is unconstitutional to recite in the public classrooms of nine western states.

The federal appeals court put that decision on hold last week to await results of a U.S. Supreme Court review of the ruling. A ruling which, if nothing else, would make a whole mess of school textbooks, wall hangings and other patriotic trappings obsolete.

Can you imagine the confusion? It's frightfully hard to stumble over the "under God" hole. Granted, it's a hole that wouldn't have been there if Congress hadn't added the phrase in 1954 to make sure everyone knew Americans loved God while hating the Commies.

I suggest substituting something a little more now, and a little more accurate:

"One nation, under surveillance ..."

(My mother's Internet connection just exploded.)

But it would be accurate if Congress passes the Domestic Security Enhancement Act of 2003. The only positive result of this act is that liberals and conservatives are united in their stance against it, to the point of group hugs and "Kum Ba Yah."

It could force people to give up their U.S. citizenship if they support an organization that supports terrorism, even if they don't know it supports terrorism. Think about that the next time you fire off a check to some seemingly innocent worldwide cause.

According to a Newhouse News Service report, analysts from the American Society of Newspaper Editors say the proposal could chill political activism and dissent, curtail access to public records and restrict our freedom to associate with whomever we please -- you know, all the principles 300,000 U.S. soldiers represent overseas.

Think such restrictions can't happen? They already are.

In New York state Monday, a 61-year-old man and his 31-year-old son were handcuffed and escorted out of a public shopping mall because they refused to remove the T-shirts they wore. One shirt bore the slogan, "Peace on Earth." The other, "Give peace a chance."

A mall security guard told the men to leave the mall or take off their shirts (which were purchased from one of the mall's stores). The son removed his. Dad refused. Both were arrested.

One nation, under God ...

Private airline companies evidently can obtain enough personal information on us to color-code our airline tickets for "safety."

One nation, under God ...

A particularly putrid piece of unsolicited e-mail I received Feb. 27 calls for boycotting the 37-cent U.S. stamp commemorating Eid.

Eid is Eid ul-Fitr, a Muslim feast marking the end of the fast of Ramadan, a period of reflection and devotion to God.

"To use this stamp would be a slap in the face to all those AMERICANS who died at the hands of those whom this stamp honors," the electronic vitriol says.

One nation, under God ...

It doesn't matter what the 9th Circuit court decides. We the people already have decided the phrase doesn't mean anything.

God help us.