Columnist Spencer Patterson: Celine’s commercialized album lites up our lives

Spencer Patterson

Friday, April 11, 2003 | 8:54 a.m.

Spencer Patterson covers music for the Sun. His music notes column appears Fridays. Reach him at spencer@lasvegassun.com or (702) 259-2309.

You can tell a lot about Celine Dion's new album, "One Heart," without even listening to the CD.

All you have to do is take the disc out of its jewel box, and you're staring at a giant Chrysler logo through the clear plastic inlay.

When Dion and her management team brought the automaker on board to sponsor the vocalist's ongoing Caesars Palace production, "A New Day ...", it didn't really bother me. I mean, it's really no different than FedEx or America West paying for naming rights to a college bowl game or a sports arena.

But allowing Chrysler to hijack any component of the album -- be it the packaging, liner notes or the design portion of the CD itself -- is inexcusable.

Just because moviemakers cashed in on product placement long ago doesn't mean musicians should follow suit and start selling ad space between song titles.

Somehow, I actually didn't spot the Chrysler logo initially, noticing it only after giving the disc a couple of spins. By that point, it only confirmed my impression that "One Heart" will go down as a weak companion piece to her far more buzzworthy show on the Strip.

The album opens with its ode to commercialism, "I Drove All Night." Just seconds into the track, one of the album's two principle drawbacks becomes quite evident: schmaltzy production.

Though the song is built around a decent pop hook, its synthesized effects and cheesy electronic drum beats sound 20 years past their time.

By Track 2, "Love is All We Need," the disc's other major flaw shows itself: Most of the songs on "One Heart" don't afford Dion the opportunity to flex her greatest asset, her voice.

Instead, over the course of 14 cuts, she sounds like a woman in search of her sound. At times her voice takes on a Shania Twain-esque country twang. Her French-Canadian accent creeps in and out of her music. And her trademark ballads don't pack much lyrical punch.

Since Dion doesn't write her own songs, part of the blame has to go to the many songwriters who contributed. One of them, Max Martin, is best known for working with Britney Spears, which might explain why Dion seems intent on sounding young and hip at various points in the album.

The title track is easily the catchiest pop song on the disc. Don't be surprised to hear it in the supermarket sometime soon. "Have You Ever Been in Love," co-written by Daryl Hall, is the only track that truly captures Dion's effortlessly powerful pipes.

If you didn't like the live show, you'll probably hate the CD. And even if you enjoyed "A New Day ...", you'd probably be better off hanging onto your $20 and passing on the tour "souvenir" on the way out.

Quick hits

A look at a few of the shows scheduled to hit Southern Nevada in the next week:

Expletive! Kelly Osbourne, daughter of Ozzy Osbourne and star of MTV's "The Osbournes," makes her Las Vegas debut tonight at 7 at the Huntridge Theatre. The budding punk-pop singer released a cover of Madonna's "Papa Don't Preach," along with a full-length CD, "Shut Up," last year. Har Mar Superstar opens. Tickets are $12.50.

Poppy punksters Sum 41 play The Joint at the Hard Rock Hotel tonight at 8. The mischievous band raised some eyebrows last year when its video for "Still Waiting" poked fun at neo-garage acts the Strokes and the Hives, with the Canadian quartet dressed up in skinny ties and going by the tongue-in-cheek name "The Sums." Tickets are $22.50.

The Joint hosts veteran hardcore punk outfit Bad Religion Saturday at 8 p.m. The Southern California band was reinvigorated by the return of founding guitarist Brett Gurewitz in 2001 and released "The Process of Belief," its first album with Gurewitz since 1994, last year. Sparta opens. Tickets are $25.50.

On sale

It looks like local hip-hop fans will get their chance to see 50 Cent after all. The chart-topping gangsta rapper, who skipped out on a scheduled show at ibiza USA last month, has announced a May 16 concert at the House of Blues at Mandalay Bay. Tickets are $43 to $62 and go on sale Saturday at noon at the House of Blues box office, at TicketMaster outlets, by phone at 632-7600 and 474-4000 and online at hob.com and ticketmaster.com.

Grateful Dead rhythm guitarist and vocalist Bob Weir brings his side project, RatDog, back to town for a May 16 concert at the Palms' Skin Pool Lounge. Tickets are $28.50 and are on sale at the Palms' box office, at TicketMaster outlets, by phone at 474-4000 and online at ticketmaster.com and cc.com.

Built to Spill, an indie rock band hailing from Boise, Idaho, arrives in Las Vegas for a May 25 date at the House of Blues at Mandalay Bay. Draw opens. Tickets are $15 and go on sale Saturday at 10 a.m. at the House of Blues box office, by phone at 632-7600, online at hob.com and through TicketMaster.

Queen Latifah will host the sixth annual VH1 Divas concert, "VH1 Divas Duets," May 22 at the MGM Grand Garden Arena. Also scheduled to perform are Mary J. Blige, Chaka Khan and Jewel. Tickets are $60 to $175 and go on sale Saturday at 10 a.m. at the MGM box office, online at mgmgrand.com or through TicketMaster.