Letter: Explaining Bush can be confusing proposition

Friday, March 8, 2002 | 10:30 a.m.

When our C Student-in-Chief speaks, people listen but do not understand. His staff used to explain what he "really meant" after each speech. But since 9-11, he says what he means, and even the Democrats have to agree. Politically, you can't disagree with a man who led the successful Afghanistan campaign. But if you are confused by Bushisms, I'll explain.

The Bush domestic policy is take from the poor and give to the rich. His foreign policy is get Saddam for Daddy and build Star Wars for Ronald Reagan. "Evil" to President Bush means any country Reagan or Daddy didn't like or any country which has big weapons but lacks either oil or a McDonald's burger joint.

On 9-11, terrorists who were mostly Saudi Arabians attacked America, so we struck back at Afghanistan because the al-Qaida trained the Saudis there and because Afghanistan has neither oil nor Big Macs. Our next strike at those Saudi Arabians who harbor terrorists was to send troops to the Philippines.

Bush now expects to find Saudis in Iran, Iraq and North Korea. I doubt he would even find al-Qaida in North Korea. The "axis of evil" includes North Korea but not China because we do not swap our Happy Meals for North Korean tenny pumps.

If there were no axis of evil, it would become necessary for Bush to create one. In fact, he did. If this sounds crazy, it's not my idea; I'm just trying to explain George W. Bush.

JERRY BITTS