Columnist Susan Snyder: Tons of cash needed to tend to tot

Tuesday, Jan. 22, 2002 | 8:22 a.m.

This has nothing to do with Las Vegas, really, but how much does a 3-year-old girl need?

A news report published last week says Kirk Kerkorian's ex-wife is seeking child support payments of $320,000 a month.

A month.

Granted, as majority shareholder of MGM MIRAGE, the 84-year-old Kerkorian is loaded. "Billionaire" typically precedes his name in print because he is one about 65 times over.

He already has agreed to pay his ex, a 36-year-old former tennis pro, a paltry $50,000 a month. But now she wants $320,000 a month in child support, and in California court documents has explained why such a sum is justified.

Kerkorian reportedly will file a countersuit and fight the child support amount.

Go figure.

But you have to admire her creativity. I can't fathom how I'd spend $320,000 in a year -- or 10.

Lisa Kerkorian, according to the news report, says the couple's tot needs $144,000 a month for travel expenses. Obviously, a billionaire's kid is never going to know the joyless hours spent in the back seat of a car with no air conditioning as it cruises across Ohio in July during a "vacation."

But $144,000 a month? That would buy 1,297 Park-Hopper passes good for four days at Disneyland for little Kira Kerkorian -- at least, until she's 10. After that, it would buy only 1,021.

Mama says Kira needs $14,000 a month for parties, too. That means she could invite 25 friends to attend a deluxe-model, $14-a-head birthday party at Chuck E Cheese 350 times a month. That's roughly 10 a day.

In addition to the $4,900 a month needed for food (evidently, the kid eats like a thoroughbred), Kira's mama says the tyke needs $5,900 a month for eating out. That's 98.3 hamburger Happy Meals per day.

Wonder where she'll put all those little toys.

Kira also needs $2,500 for movies and outings -- understandable since it costs about $1,500 for a bag of popcorn and a Coke -- and $1,000 for toys and books. (Mom's not exactly shooting the wad on books here, is she?)

And Kira's pet bunny needs $436 a month. Cripes, the rabbit eats better than most families.

Poor kid. Even $320,000 a month probably never will buy her what she really needs or wants.

Maybe Kira's mama can use the leftover Happy Meal money to buy her darling daughter an advertisement on Las Vegas City Hall.

A picture of a cherubic toddler would have to be a vast improvement over Lord knows what will end up there if city council members approve a proposal to allow ads on public buildings.

Mayor Oscar Goodman told a Las Vegas Sun reporter last week such ads could raise much-needed money for the city, but "can't embarrass the city."

It's hard to imagine what, if anything, could embarrass a city in which photos of bare-bottomed women sit atop taxi cabs. But it is equally hard to imagine what it would look like if ads popped up on park benches or at the bottom of public swimming pools.

However, it would be cool if they reserved the outside walls of public restrooms for political campaign ads.

Las Vegas could be the first city in the country to put such testimonials where they belong.