Columnist Erin Neff: Prepare to be spun on euphemistic Yucca tour

Erin Neff

Friday, April 5, 2002 | 5:19 a.m.

NEVADANS are poised to get a package.

Good things typically come in packages -- you know, birthdays, holidays, surprises -- but not in this case.

Unless something drastic happens, the "package" that's on its way will be the deadliest substance known to man.

Welcome to the Energy Department's English 101 -- a course meant to soften the potential horror of nuclear waste through field trips to Yucca Mountain, euphemistic language and the sanitized science of the federal government.

In their goal to win favor for the Yucca Mountain "project," Energy Department staffers parse language, spin the "science" and divert attention to make the argument for the dump, er, nuclear waste repository as pleasant as possible.

On the official public Yucca Mountain tour, for those lucky enough to grab a seat on one of three charter buses heading north for the site, there's plenty of talk about nuclear science in coded terms.

"Package" is the sanitized word the Energy Department uses to say: cask of deadly radioactive waste.

"Repository" is scientist talk for a lovely mountain where said "packages" will go.

"Emplacement" is the term for shoving the radioactive waste inside the mountain where it will fester, decay and -- some believe -- eventually leech into the groundwater.

The Energy Department's free tour of the proposed nuclear waste dump 90 miles outside Las Vegas is almost as popular as a junket to Laughlin, and with $6 lunches from Marie Callendar's, it's almost as fulfilling -- save for that "science" you get to see.

The tour is designed to assure the public that the "science" going on there proves that storing nuclear waste is safe.

The scientist on board your comfortable bus explains how nuclear reactors work. He talks about the years of studies that have taken place. And if someone asks whether it's safe to ship this stuff across the country, he's quick with a 1980s-era videotape of a cask test in New Mexico.

There's footage for the overhead television screens showing casks bouncing off trucks and trains, slamming into walls and withstanding fire without breaking. And don't worry -- or ask -- about pesky reports of a video showing a missile blowing a hole through a cask. After all, he says, that's a stretch, and nothing is ever foolproof.

What you really get on the Yucca Mountain trip is a tour as diversionary as the language.

Even before the bus turns the dusty stretch leading to the mountain, there's talk of the desert tortoise population nearby and the Tunnel Boring Machine (that's TBM on the itinerary) that dug a 5-mile tunnel into the volcanic ridge.

"It's for sale and it's only got five miles on it," the bus driver joked as several sneaker-clad seniors looked in admiration at the device during a 20-minute stop to gape at the hulking electric contraption.

The Energy Department also takes you in a small van to the crest of Yucca Mountain where a geologist discusses volcanism, points to Death Valley National Park and mentions the closed gold mine across the chasm in the desert -- to the oohs and ahs of tour-goers.

The friendly staff -- whether displaying native American artifacts or a stuffed bobcat ("got electrocuted on a power pole") -- is also quick with commentary.

During a break for lunch there's plenty of talk like, "It's a lot different once you're here" and "Now you get to see the side of things you don't read in the paper."

Maybe the news my tour missed was happening inside Yucca Mountain to explain how safe it really is.

After donning hard hats and safety glasses tour-goers get to walk 100 yards into the tunnel and off to a small carved-out room with florescent lights, folding chairs and an easel with drawings of the mountain's interior.

There weren't any scientists boring holes in the mountain, but a geologist talked about the holes and the heat and water tests already conducted. The repository, he said when asked, will be built deeper in the tunnel where they haven't tested the rock or the water.

But that didn't seem to matter. The Energy Department keeps pushing its cheery version of the "facts" whether on the tour, the Internet, the department's reading room or in its literature.

Sheldon Rampton, editor of PR Watch (prwatch.org) and the co-author of "Toxic Sludge is Good For You," compares the Energy Department's PR machine to the original "Terminator" -- the unfeeling movie machine that stopped at nothing to destroy.

"The state of Nevada has fought them off so many times, and they're still coming and coming," Rampton said.

Now, Rampton said, the government is using the anti-terrorism angle (Remember Sept. 11? Wouldn't want that to happen to a nuclear power plant.) to "ram through Yucca Mountain" so the nuclear industry can keep churning out profitable power.

"No one's talking about energy conservation," Rampton said. "All of the vested political interests in Washington are just sticking terrorism labels on things as an excuse."

The Energy Department is aware that some people who take the Yucca Mountain tour aren't exactly keen on seeing it turned into a toxic dump. So as you cruise back to Las Vegas, belly full of a sandwich and mind full of "science," officials ask you to fill out a survey so they can improve the tour.

Next month, they might grill hot dogs at the base of the mountain as one frequent tour-goer said he was treated to last summer. And the literature might include a few more references to Sept. 11 -- colored of course in red, white and blue -- because that might make it as palatable as a summertime barbecue.