Columnist Kate Maddox: For Rudner, life is a Cabaret

Kate Maddox

Tuesday, March 20, 2001 | 8:20 a.m.

Kate Maddox's column appears Tuesdays, Fridays and Sundays. Reach her at 259-2309 or kmaddox@lasvegassun.com.

Rita Rudner announced her new deal with New York-New York at a Monday press conference. Rudner, who decided sharing an MGM Grand stage with "those naked ladies from France" wasn't her cup of tea, appears to have landed nicely.

Rudner opens New York-New York's new 426-seat Cabaret Theatre on April 20. Her contract is open-ended and she's planning to stick around for a while.

"I'm going to love living here,"she said. "I don't want to have to keep getting on planes to do my job. I can't do that anymore ... I'm exhausted."

After closing at the MGM in January, Rudner fielded offers from four major Strip properties. She narrowed it down to the Las Vegas Hilton and New York-New York, but ultimately decided on the hotel that never sleeps. "I was very lucky. I got two very attractive offers."

Rudner also extolled Vegas' comedic virtues. "I always have new material here. I can write new jokes every day and then try them out on an audience that same night." (In the meantime, Rudner says she's helping pal Steve Martin with his Oscar schtick. She stayed mum on details, but did add that the material she's seen is "very, very funny.")

Rudner's Las Vegas living arrangements aren't quite set yet. An apartment at Turnberry Place won't be complete for another year, so Rudner and her husband, Martin Bergman (plus their pooch, Bonkers), will rent until then.

Her brood plans to relocate for good in early April, a few weeks before her first show. "Well, we need time to buy sheets, you know," Rudner deadpanned. "Towels. An ironing board. All the essentials."

Was it the Corona or Matt Damon egging Ben Affleck on at the blackjack tables on Friday night? (Or was it that little, "Problem? What problem? I don't have no stinkin' problem."?)

According to one witness, a drunkenesque Affleck tossed out $10,000 bets left and right, dumbfounding most of his Bellagio tablemates. In one flurry of hands, the Mexican beer-swilling Affleck managed to lose $50,000. An observer said the cheerful star was betting big money even when the cards were obviously not in his favor. I smell an intervention.

It's that time of year again, ladies (and gentlemen?). Those hot Clark County firefighters are set to auction themselves off for a good cause Thursday night at the House of Blues. The "Too Hot to Handle" auction action benefits the county's Burn Foundation. Twenty all-inclusive date packages have been set up with some of the hunkiest bachelors ever to work the hose. (Did I just say that?)

Doors open at 7 p.m., tickets are $25. Call the HOB box office at 632-7600. If you can't wait 'til Thursday and want dibs on one particular fireman, stop by Gordon Biersch between 5 and 7 tonight and pick up a "Too Hot to Handle" calendar for the men on hand to autograph. Proceeds from the calendar also go to the Burn Foundation.

Those "Steffi is preggers" rumors are making the rounds again. The New York Daily News is reporting that a chatty Steffi Graf is telling chums that she's pregnant with Andre Agassi's baby. Unlike last the last time these rumors surfaced, no one in the know is saying it isn't true.

The Las Vegas Outlaws earned a dubious title this weekend. Without much ado -- apparently -- our XFL team played itself right into the history books. The Outlaws' game against the Birmingham Bolts on Saturday night was the lowest-rated prime-time sporting event in network television history. Ouch.