Columnist Ron Kantowski: No vacancy at the graveyard

Thursday, March 15, 2001 | 10:01 a.m.

Ron Kantowski's column appears Thursday. Reach him at ron@lasvegassun.com or 259-4088.

Well, we buried another one Tuesday. The International Basketball League's Bandits became the 18th (as best as anybody can recall) Las Vegas minor league sports franchise to succumb to lack of interest/finances/a clue.

At least by the time the XFL Outlaws go under, we won't have to shell out money for a tombstone. They'll have to be cremated, because there's no room left in the graveyard.

Do the math: We're 1-for-19 as a minor league sports town. Those are Bob Buhl numbers. If you don't get the reference, ask any Braves or Cubs fan over the age of 40. Buhl was a light-hitting pitcher (and that's putting it mildly) whose lifetime batting average was .089 (76 hits in 857 at-bats). But he would have hit ahead of Las Vegas in the lineup, because we're batting a putrid .053 with our minor league franchises.

And that one "hit" -- the triple-A Las Vegas Stars/51s -- should have a big, fat asterisk placed alongside. Because were it not for the parent club picking up the tab on player salaries and the organization's sweetheart lease at Cashman Field, the Stars/51s would be pushing up daisies, too.

This is how it has worked around here for the past 15 years. Minor league franchise announces a grandiose plan to play in Las Vegas. Minor league franchise attracts big crowd for home opener. Local sports columnist, who has seen it all before, writes the next day that minor league franchise has zero chance for long-term survival. The day after that, officials representing minor league franchise invite local sports columnist to lunch, where they will try to explain to him why their grandiose plan makes more sense than the last guy's grandiose plan.

Local sports columnist, who also has heard it all before, politely declines and has lunch at Del Taco instead -- where it's almost even money he'll bump into a former owner of a former Las Vegas minor league sports franchise, now penniless, trolling for a bean-and-cheese burrito.

I used to feel sympathy for these guys. Not anymore. If they would only do their homework, they would realize that letting their entire bankroll ride on one hand of blackjack makes infinitely more sense than investing it on minor league sports in our city.

One of these days, they'll learn. But it won't be this week. Even as you are reading this, a new women's professional football league is planning on putting a franchise here. Bob Buhl lives!

Bandits president Mike Olson said the reason his team didn't last two seasons is because there's no sense of community in Las Vegas. He's mostly right. Minor league sports works in places such as Rockford, Ill., or Sioux Falls, S.D., or anywhere else where the public transportation system comprises a taxicab or two. Or even better, a guy with big handlebars on his 10-speed bike.

So do yourself a favor. The next time the owner of a Las Vegas minor league sports franchise announces he's it in for the long haul, and that the team is going to outlast even Cook E. Jarr (which basically is what Bandits' chief Jackie Robinson said no more than three weeks ago), send your dark blue suit to the cleaners. Get out to the arena/stadium/rink to pay your respects. And send flowers.

Because the team probably will be dead within the month.