Columnist John Katsilometes: This joke should not be on us

Monday, July 9, 2001 | 8:42 a.m.

John Katsilometes is the Sun features editor. His column appears Mondays. Reach him at kats@lasvegassun.com or 259-2327.

If there's anything we can't stand -- and by "we" I mean "anyone who agrees with this opinion" -- it's hypocrisy.

And anyone who agrees with this opinion is free to verbally strafe Paula Poundstone. If she's guilty, she deserves it.

Poundstone, you've likely gleaned from media reports, was arrested and charged with child endangerment on June 27 in Malibu, Calif., at around 3 o'clock in the afternoon (I mention the time of day because it usually doesn't get much better than a sunny June afternoon in Malibu, unless ...).

The details are that Poundstone was charged with three counts of committing a lewd act on a girl under the age of 14, as well as endangering the two other girls and two boys. All of the charges are for incidents that allegedly took place recently, between May 19-June 6.

Poundstone is a frequent Las Vegas headliner and one of the nation's more popular stand-up comics. Her scheduled appearance at Sunset Station on July 28 has been "postponed," according to hotel officials, and the rescheduled date might well be part of a three-part bill: the Flying Pigs, the Snowballs in Hell and Paula Poundstone.

Poundstone's arrest, and the alarming nature of the charges, was of particular interest in the Accent department. In February Poundstone was the subject of a Sunday Q&Accent conducted by feature writer Jerry Fink. The interview coincided with Poundstone's most recent appearance at Sunset Station's Club Madrid, and along with promoting that show and her gig on the syndicated quiz show "To Tell the Truth" (how's that for a bitingly ironic title, eh?), Poundstone related her experiences as a single foster mother.

Samples of her comments from February:

"... I thought, 'Gee, I have a funny feeling there are some kids out there who could use a break.' "

And, "From kid to kid, it's different. Some of it's really fun and some of it is anguishing -- the worst, most horrible thing you can ever imagine. I'm not one of those glassy-eyed moms who thinks every moment is golden. Even having said that, I still wouldn't trade it for anything."

And, "I have never kept a secret before in my life."

We'll see.

Legal issues notwithstanding -- the 41-year-old Poundstone faces up to 13 years and four months in prison if convicted of all charges -- Poundstone's portrayal of herself as a selfless caregiver is particularly galling. This episode is similar to the Kathie Lee Gifford-sweatshop controversy of a few years ago. It's one thing to commit transgressions against society, knowingly or not (self-styled super mom Kathie Lee was conveniently ignorant of how clothes bearing her name were manufactured). But to do so while living the charade of wholesome conduct and noble intent -- and using your foster parenthood as a focal point of your stand-up act, as Poundstone did -- is nauseating.

We should be aware that Poundstone could very well be innocent. At her arraignment last week she solemnly pled, "Not guilty, your honor." But if she is guilty, she faces more than a jail term. The court of public opinion will be infinitely more harsh.