Columnist Susan Snyder: Car boasts artificial intelligence

Friday, Dec. 28, 2001 | 12:14 p.m.

Susan Snyder's column appears Fridays, Sundays and Tuesdays. Reach her at snyder@lasvegassun.com or 259-4082.

A couple of IBM researchers have invented an electronic in-car system that keeps drivers awake by talking to them.

They call it Artificial Passenger.

Big deal. My old man had one for 35 years.

We called her "Mother."

"Jim, you're falling asleep. I can see your eyes closing," Mom said, activating an early warning system that was as much apart of family vacations as the imaginary boundary line on the back seat.

My dad was a sleeping legend. He could doze off anywhere. We once balanced five theater programs on his shoulder while he slept through my cousin's graduation. They stayed there until Mom jabbed him in the ribs as the ceremony ended. Thought we'd laugh until she beat us to death.

So rest assured that if not for his Siren of Insomnolence, our King of Nod would have had no trouble snoozing behind the wheel of our 1971 Mercury while pulling a trailer through the Rocky Mountains at 85 mph.

Artificial Passenger is designed to keep solo drivers alert by starting conversations, changing the radio station, telling jokes, playing word games and monitoring the driver's reactions to detect whether he or she is falling asleep.

It picks up on the driver's responses with microphones that can be embedded in the seat belt, sun visor or rear-view mirror. Responses are decoded with speech-recognition software.

If the driver is dopey, Artificial Wife, er, Passenger suggests the driver pull over and get a motel room.

Dad's in-car device wasn't as direct in her suggestions. She focused on outcomes and let him figure out the rest.

"You're going to kill us all!" she'd bellow, jolting not only Dad but probably the drivers of two other misery-packed family vehicles and that of an 18-wheeler who figured his Citizens Band radio had exploded.

The woman's voice carried more firepower than a field artillery battalion.

Artificial Passenger supposedly will be able to detect small movements indicating a drowsy driver, such as an eyelid closing, and may react by opening a window or sounding an alarm.

Dad's system always opted for the alarm.

"JIM! Are you going to drive us over the side of the mountain? Will that make you happy?!"

That is not a question one asks a man who has spent the past five hours confined to a rolling prison cell. We did not want her ask it, and we did not want to know the answer. We knew what we'd have chosen.

Artificial Passenger's alarm should fit the driver's personality, researchers said. They cited a study in which 90 percent of truck drivers polled preferred a computer beep over a warning given in a stern woman's voice. At least half said they didn't like the woman's voice scolding them.

Artificial Passenger's creators also say the device won't babble. It will be silent when the driver needs to focus, such as when he is braking, changing lanes or about to get us all killed by "that semitrailer is drifting into our lane -- JIM, WAKE UP!"

Maybe it would help if Artificial Passenger also emitted a thumping noise that sounds as if someone riding shotgun is pumping a phantom brake pedal.

Dad should have patented his system. Too bad he was asleep at the wheel.