Columnist Dean Juipe: Miller’s time has expired

Dean Juipe

Wednesday, Sept. 13, 2000 | 10:24 a.m.

Dean Juipe's column appears Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. His boxing notebook appears Thursday. Reach him at juipe@lasvegassun.com or 259-4084.

The jury has ceased deliberating. The verdict is in.

Dennis Miller is terrible as a football broadcaster and the sooner ABC gets him off its Monday Night staff, the better.

He has had his chance and he has failed.

Now the pressure to respond reverts to a network that took a risk it never should have considered in the first place. The idea of placing a satiric humorist in a football broadcasting booth was wide left from the outset.

A colleague's belief that Miller won't last the season now has to be seen as more than just wishful thinking. Based on his off-color remarks and distant references, it can be argued that Miller is begging to be let go and won't be surprised when it happens.

His material is too blue, too offensive, too remote.

It's also frequently too inaccurate or too misleading, the result of being a novice analyst at this level. (One such statement, following an interception by New England's Antonio Langham during this week's game with the New York Jets, drew corrections from Miller's broadcasting partners, Al Michaels and Dan Fouts.)

Michaels can't be amused with having to babysit Miller and his forced smile after Miller said the New York vs. New England game would be won by the team "with the best Woody" couldn't pass by unnoticed.

To most football fans, Miller has worn out his welcome. While they were willing to withhold a definitive judgment on him until he had a few weeks under his belt, the public has since heard enough.

In an America Online poll released Tuesday, the majority of respondents gave Miller an unacceptable grade. His intentionally cute style is wearing thin just two weeks into the regular season.

While he seemed a better choice than Rush Limbaugh when ABC was looking to fill its important Monday Night Football vacancy last summer, Miller has done nothing to disprove the obvious. As a somewhat elitist comedian in front of a well-educated audience, he's clever and often funny.

But as a high-profile football analyst on a multimillion-dollar telecast, he's a failure.

It's also clear he's not going to get any better, or smoother, or seem more natural for the task, in spite of his admission last week that he needed to improve at picking his spots. He still has lines that come across as if they're being read from a card -- and no time is the right time for that type of prefabricated script.

Of course it can't be denied that Miller is at least partially fulfilling the role ABC envisioned when it hired him. He is eliciting a widespread response from the media and the viewing public, even if most of it is hugely negative.

But at a certain point ABC has to listen to the critics and the bar talk, and weigh the impact Miller is having on its audience, its advertisers and its reputation.

ABC was anxious for attention, which it is getting with Miller, but it has come at a cost. Now the question becomes: Why would it want to be known for its frivolous and jocular handling of the NFL, when a professional approach has long been the standard?

If it were up to the viewers and the majority ruled, Miller would already be gone.

A few more of those "Woody" remarks and he'll force the network's hand.