Letter: Advice for the IRL

Ron@lasvegassun.com

Friday, May 5, 2000 | 10:08 a.m.

I was reading your paper's sports page online and I saw an interesting quote in regard to Las Vegas by Indy Racing League chief Tony George. In commenting on the virtual no-show by local fans, he said, "Sooner or later we have to figure out a date that works ... "

Normally I charge for this kind of information. But please pass these thoughts along to our mutual "friend" with my compliments.

* Start by putting fenders on those cars of his. Load 'em up with doors, hoods, beer holders and gun racks ... heck, he can even put a deer's head on the rollbar if he wants. Those cars sound more like NASCRUNCHERS anyway ... might as well make 'em look like 'em, too.

* Take your whole IRL act down to Possum Stump, Tenn., or Alabama or South Carolina, and roll 'em out on some bullring oval. He likes ovals, give him ovals.

* Package your event with some "50-cent Warm Beer" promotion and I can guarantee that every Billy Bob in 10 counties will show up. Drunk or sober, it's a paid ticket.

* So ol' Tony wants a good date ... why not Robert E. Lee's birthday? And don't forget those Confederate flags. He can't hang them on the courthouse anymore but he sure as heck can festoon some racetrack back up in the pineywoods somewhere.

Jumpin' grits and hog gravy! I'm so excited. I wonder if ol' Tony will cut me in on a piece of the action?

-- MIKE ROSE

The Las Vegas Sun welcomes letters to the sports editor. They should be no more than 250 words and may be shortened by the editor. All letters, faxes and e-mail must include the writer's name, address and telephone number.

Mail letters to: Letters to the Sports Editor, Las Vegas Sun, P.O. Box 4275, Las Vegas, NV 89127. Fax: 383-7264. E-mail: Ron@lasvegassun.com