The Movie Guys: Shandling orbiting without wit on ‘What Planet’

Friday, March 3, 2000 | 9:29 a.m.

The Movie Guys, starring Jeff Howard and Dave Neil, appears Fridays in then They can also be seen on the 11 a.m. Friday newscast on KVVU Channel 5. Pl check them out online at lasvegassun.com/sun/sunlife/ movies and themovieguys.com.

Grades: Jeff F, Dave D+.

Starring: Garry Shandling, Annette Bening, Greg Kinnear, Ben Kingsley, Linda Fiorentino, John Goodman.

Screenplay: Gary Shandling, Michael Leeson, Ed Solomon, Peter Tolan.

Director: Mike Nichols.

Rated: R for sexuality and language.

Running time: 100 minutes.

Playing at: UA Green Valley Cinemas, Rancho Santa Fe 16, Century Orleans, Century Desert 16, Century Cinedome 12 Henderson, Regal Cinemas Colonnade 14, Regal Cinemas Texas Station 18, Regal Cinemas Village Square 18.

Synopsis: From Oscar-winning director Mike Nichols comes "What Planet Are you From?" a racy, utterly irreverent comedy that follows an extraterrestrial (played by Garry Shandling) whose mission is to impregnate a woman on Earth in order to ensure his planet's domination of the universe. Through a series of mishaps and failed attempts at meeting his objective, our alien is soon a victim of the courting and mating anxieties that plague all Earthlings.

Jeff: I would have never believed that I could view a film that could duplicate the intense pain and agony of a root canal. I have. Nothing is more excruciating than an unfunny comedy that dies a thousand deaths. Every joke in "What Planet Are You From?" flat-lines on the alien operating table. The jokes rely on bathroom humor and heavily on one gag -- Alien H1449-6's vibrating crotch.

Shandling is an alien who must mate with a human to begin a race to conquer Earth for the invaders. Since he's from another world, he was haphazardly trained in the art of sex and relationships. What then ensues is one penis joke after another, with Shandling's crotch vibrating every time he gets aroused. It loses its humor after the 10th time it goes off. This lowbrow comedy is a chauvinistic caricature of the human race at its worst moments.

Dave: The last thing I want is to come across as the film's defensive spokesman behind the extreme dramatic and lambasting allegations that my colleague Jeff has, and will be, making. After all, the comedic talents of Shandling (HBO's "The Larry Sanders Show") and Nichols' respectable filmography (which includes "The Graduate," "Working Girl" and "The Birdcage") should speak for themselves. Under the identity of Harold Anderson, a Seattle native who has moved to Phoenix as a bank manager, Shandling begins to look for the one female who will fulfill his secret mission.

It isn't long after combing an Alcoholics Anonymous seminar with his adulterous co-worker (a slick Greg Kinnear) that they literally run into the vulnerable Susan (Annette Bening, Oscar nominee for "American Beauty") and a courtship begins. The problem, however, is that after living such a fast and loose life, Susan wishes to remain celibate until she is married. Naturally for Harold, he is confused by his mixed emotions since his alien race has evolved to an emotionless state. Meanwhile, an FAA agent (John Goodman) becomes suspicious of Harold's nature when investigating the bizarre occurrences aboard the airline flights that Harold uses to make his entrance on Earth and communicate with his planet's leader (Ben Kingsley).

Jeff: A roll call of the dead. Each sorry supporting character is an embarrassment. For starters, the brilliant Goodman as an FAA agent who suspects Harold is an alien. Does he keep his outrageous opinions to himself? No. Forget the facts. He preaches invasion to everyone from his superiors at the FAA (the airline industry's answer to "The X-Files") to his wife. He's the crazy man crying wolf. And that's funny? Kinnear, (for whom I had so much respect after "As Good As It Gets") is misused and degrading. As for Oscar winner Kingsley, who gave the best performance of the '80s as "Gandhi," well, cover your face in shame.

The movie's last, crippled attempt to deliver a message about the differences of the sexes feels like a last-minute effort to play upon our sentiments. I shudder to think what beings from another world would think of the human race after seeing "What Planet Are You From?" No intelligent life here. Move on to the next planet.

Dave: Well, Jeff, if that doesn't send a direct message of contempt for this movie, I don't know what will. Only Bening delivers a fully developed character, whose convincing sentiment is wasted as the film's routine straight man. Shandling's patented deadpan delivery is relied on too heavily and the movie is filled with ridiculous subplots. I'd bet there is some extra footage that landed on the editing room floor, leaving plots with holes and little resolution.

Take, for example, the shifty Kinnear, who takes credit for Shandling's work around the office, which earns him the vice presidency. Yet when the two come to blows, nothing is settled and we see Kinnear and his sultry wife (a walk-through performance by Linda Fiorentino) attending Harold and Susan's wedding celebration.

As for the sight gags and quick jokes, they fall to the wayside, replaced by redundancy and stereotypes. It's all a surprise coming from the clever talents of director Nichols, who should've made an uproarious battle between the sexes.