Columnist Ron Kantowski: Team Tyson drops ball yet again

Thursday, Jan. 13, 2000 | 11:54 a.m.

Ron Kantowski's notes column appears Tuesday and Thursday. Reach him at ron@vegas.com or 259-4088.

There's a new addition to the list of all-time worst teams, deserving of a dishonorable mention with the '62 Mets, '72 Sixers, Chicago Cubs (pick your year) and the two imposters who comprised Milli Vanilli.

Based on this week's news reports out of London, if boxing's Team Tyson pooled its collective resources and multiplied them by 2, it might have the common sense it takes to change a light bulb. Provided the bulb is no brighter than they apparently are.

Wouldn't you think that Shelley Finkel or Dan Goossen or any of Tyson's other sycophants -- er, advisers -- would have had the good sense to check that the fighter's papers were in order before presenting them to the Home Office (a real agency) in England for approval, so that Tyson could continue on his comeback against Briton Julius Francis on Jan. 29?

Apparently, they did not.

As Tyson himself would say, "That is ludicrous."

Because nobody with Team Tyson bothered to check with the Immigration Service in England to determine whether Tyson's rape conviction would prevent him from entering the country, the fighter's fate nearly rested in the hands of some guy named Nigel.

Prior to being cleared today, and as hard as this seems to believe, a single immigration officer could have determined whether Tyson had the right to carry on when he arrives at Heathrow Airport early next week.

Tyson's only recourse was to show "compassionate reasons" why he should be allowed into the country.

I guess the fact he is surrounded by dummies was good enough for the authorities.

* HE COULDA BEEN A COUGAR: If UNLV's Danny Brotherson appeared chummy with several of the Brigham Young players prior to Monday's game here, there is a pretty good reason for it: He was nearly their teammate.

According to Brotherson's father, Kirk, Danny was all but signed, sealed and delivered to Provo when Cougars coach Steve Cleveland took the scholarship that was going to be Brotherson's and gave it to Terrell Lyday instead.

Anybody who witnessed Monday's game knows why.

The 6-foot-3 Lyday, who was coming off a 35-point effort against Utah State last Saturday, burned the Rebels for 30 more. He also snared 11 rebounds and made six steals.

The guy appears to be a scoring machine and apparently there's nothing he can't do on a basketball court. Just ask Arizona State's Eddie House, who torched the Rebels for 39 points last season (27 in the second half) and Cal for a whopping 61 this past Saturday.

With Lyday watching the House when the Cougars and Devils met earlier this season, it was like Home Alone 3, with Lyday reprising the role of Macauley Culkin and House one of the bumbling burglars. House went 0-for-16 from the floor with Lyday checking him.

Given that Lyday played at Fresno City College, you wonder how Jerry Tarkanian let him get away.

* MORE TARK: File this somewhere in the gray area between speculation and fact: Word is that one of the reasons that former UNLV athletic director Brad Rothermel decided to become president/GM of the Las Vegas franchise in the "new ABA" that expects to debut next fall is that he has a handshake agreement with his old coach to become his new one.

With his Fresno State team wallowing in mediocrity and having stated more than once that he would like to retire to Las Vegas, the scenario that would have Tark returning to coach the speculative minor league team certainly seems plausible.

* TIMING IS EVERYTHING BUT ... There was a quote from new baseball Hall of Famer Tony Perez that went something to the effect that if he was ever going to be elected to the shrine in Cooperstown, this was the year. Next year, Perez reasoned he would have gotten lost in the shuffle with guys such as Kirby Puckett, Dave Winfield, Lou Whitaker and Don Mattingly becoming Hall-eligible.

When you think about it, that seems as wrong as a John Rocker manifesto. It should be either you have the credentials to get in or you don't, regardless of what year it is, who's standing next to you in line or how many beers you bought a sports writer during your playing days.

* FALSE ADVERTISING: A TV spot now running for the Richard Petty Driving Experience at Las Vegas Motor Speedway depicts a pack of Winston Cup replica stock cars running side-by-side around the 1.5-mile oval, suggesting that would the kind of racing you would be doing if you anted up the money for the privilege.

Not quite. The closest you'll come to another machine is about 10 car lengths, the minimum distance at which the wannabe Rustys and Dales are allowed to follow the instructor.

Not that that's a bad rule. Or that racing around the track in a regulation race car all by your lonesome is boring, because it isn't.

But if Dale Earnhardt and Terry Labonte have trouble running bumper to bumper, guys who lay carpet for a living would scatter sheet metal from here to Mesquite if you let them.

Just ask the guy who started feeling brave in Wednesday's CART 101 session, the open-wheel racing equivalent of the Petty Experience, out at LVMS. Lapping the track at a pedestrian 120 mph, he stuffed his car into the Turn 2 wall and was treated to a little too much racing realism -- a broken leg.

In retrospect, perhaps the bumper cars at the Scandia family fun center would have been more his speed.

* AROUND THE HORN: Enough weird stuff happens here as is without a national publication such as Sports Illustrated adding to our negative image. SI incorrectly reported this week that Las Vegas police are investigating a claim of sexual assault against Oscar De La Hoya stemming from an incident at the boxer's home on Dec. 26. That might be possible, provided De La Hoya lived here. ... Who do you think will sign more autographs during a Sam's Town card show this weekend: former San Diego Padre Nate Colbert, now of Las Vegas, or former Playmate of the Year (1992) Corinna Harney, always of Las Vegas? I'd make Corinna about a minus 900 favorite. ... Go figure: the Indiana Pacers selected Al Harrington and Jonathan Bender as their representatives to the NBA's "Stay in School" program, despite the fact both bypassed college for the NBA. ... And finally, a shocker in these days of permissiveness in which the inmates often run the asylum: One of the first rules Isiah Thomas established upon taking over ownership of the Continental Basketball Association was that players and coaches must wear a coat, shirt, slacks and shoes when traveling. No wonder Master P jumped to the IBL.