Dial File — Steve Bornfeld: Lights are bright on Broadway TV

Friday, Feb. 4, 2000 | 8:32 a.m.

Steve Bornfeld is the Sun features editor. His television column appears Fridays. Reach him at steveb@vegas.com or 259-4081.

As Billy Shakes so eloquently opined:

"All the world's a TV sound stage; and all the men and women, merely SAG members."

Well, if that's not exactly the way the Bard of Avon phrased it, he might as well have had he lived a bit longer and was churning out "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" scripts while dating Sarah Michelle Gellar and chatting with Joan Rivers about the diamond studs on his powder blue tux at the Golden Globes.

His treasured quote, of course -- "all the world's a stage and all the men and women, merely players" from "As You Like It" -- made its metaphorical connection to theater, traditionally considered a most odious intruder in the hip, flip world of television. Until now.

The thrill, the immediacy, the one-on-one, flesh-and-blood, hey-I'm-talkin'-to-you, pinned-to-your-seat, right-in-front-of-your-kisser karma of it all that theater delivers can never be equaled. And it has never been truly duplicated outside of the hushed, darkened and magical world that is a theater.

Can it be? And can it still reach into your gut as you slump into your torn, hairball-matted La-Z-Boy armed with a half-eaten bag of Tostitos and a six-pack of Miller Lite?

Thanks to TV -- the medium that literally invented the elegant aforementioned scene -- we're about to find out.

The curtain will soon go up on Broadway productions in homes not only on the theater-savvy coasts but between coasts, as the electricity of live theater electrifies the folks who traditionally have to schlep to New York, Los Angeles or London -- or wait endlessly for a road company to barrel through town -- for a bracing shot of live theater.

The enterprise is called the Broadway Television Network (BTN), which plans to serve up at least a dozen plays as one-night-only pay-per-view events over the next five years.

The ambitious project kicks off in the spring with "Smokey Joe's Cafe" (fee: $35), the long-running musical that recently had its closing performance taped. After that, the shows go live, with performances carried in wide-screen, digital, high-definition format. Once the shows have raked in the PPV bucks, they will be shown on cable and the broadcast networks, and then released on home video.

Megahits such as "Phantom of the Opera" and the revival of "Kiss Me Kate" are under consideration as future productions, although no show will be mounted unless it has survived on the Great White Way for at least six months (a factor that guarantees that a live national presentation early in a show's run won't choke off ticket sales and prematurely kill it, while also giving a show a chance to prove its popularity and its viability as a TV production).

Kay Koplovitz, BTN's chairwoman, told the Associated Press: "This will be a new electronic face to the theater."

Anything that increases the presence of theater, which has long been left behind in the explosion of electronic entertainment, is tremendously welcome. No matter how tasty our home amusement menus have grown in the DVD/VCR/HDTV era, our pop culture diet without theater is essentially a Happy Meal.

But that's not to say that while the idea is nutritious, it'll be delicious -- at times it could be the viewing equivalent of eating your asparagus -- at least from a practical point of view.

Theater-style drama has always been entwined in TV history, from "The Queen's Messenger," a spy story broadcast from a studio in upstate New York in 1928, right through the recently filmed broadcast of "Death of a Salesman" on Showtime. And of course, there's TV's hallowed "golden age" of live drama in the "Playhouse 90"/"Requiem for a Heavyweight"/"Marty" mold that will be revived in April with "Fail-Safe." And yet ...

Theater has always seemed to television like grandma's house next to the Playboy Mansion -- a respected relic with an air of antiquity, a dull, dutiful decor and the faint whiff of prescription medicine wafting through.

Not to mention an air of snobbery arising from a perception of being New York-exclusive, largely reinforced every year by the perennially low-rated Tony Awards show. Unfailingly slammed as stiff and static, the Tonys are rife with categories and performers who -- with the exception of the occasional movie or TV stars who return to their theater roots -- leave the American public mystified. And turned off. And tuned out.

(If not for the glamming-up of the Tonys -- Rosie O'Donnell hosting and the David Hyde Pierces, Nathan Lanes and Jason Alexanders who parlayed theater fame into national recognition -- the CBS show would have been banished to cable or PBS years ago.)

And the abbreviated scenes performed for the Tonys -- especially the nonmusicals -- crystalize the problem. On TV -- which has multiplied its demand for perpetual visual action over the years -- powerful theater writing and acting are reduced to dramatic readings in front of sparse sets, the appeal bordering on the Victorian.

A stage encased in the TV box is like a museum exhibit under glass: admirable, but inert -- and emotionally inaccessible. And yet ...

BTN could be a transformative force, turning theater into a mesmerizing, multidimensional TV show. The tentative plan is to expand the theater experience to fit TV's needs. BTN productions will feature perks not afforded the average Broadway patron, including: a half-hour of pre-show profiles and interviews, a 15-minute presentation during intermissions and sneak peaks -- thanks to a backstage camera -- of set changes and behind-the-scenes action.

(Sound familiar? Think: Sports programming.)

And, most crucially: Techonology could very well goose theater on TV from inert to intense. Productions will be televised in wide-screen, high-definition, surround-sound splendor, amplifying its appeal. Nothing filtered through a camera will ever thoroughly convey theater's bolt-of-lightening, in-the-flesh charisma. But technology might make it close enough.

And BTN also offers business benefits: In an age where pay-per-view profits are largely dependent on male viewers via sports events, theatrical productions can expand the consumer base, drawing in women and families.

If BTN succeeds -- and we all benefit if it does -- Billy Shakes surely wouldn't mind being re-re-written: "All the world's a PPV event. And all the men and women, merely subscribers."

Croon a Tune: Last week's three-part quiz was a stumper for a lot of Tune Crooners, who were asked: A) the name of the series theme; B) the star of the series, who was mentioned in last week's Dial File; and C) the name of the male theme song singer.

Answers: A) "Family Ties"; B) Michael J. Fox; C) Johnny Mathis.

The Fox-y Croon-a-Tuners with all the answers: Alex Jeanos, Tony Varchetto, Karin Gavin and Dan Brown, plus winner-and-a-halves Joe Lacy and Andrew Hatcher, who both went us one better by also naming Mathis' female duet partner on the theme, Deniece Williams. And Penelope Wells also dug the distinctive pipes of the Mighty Mathis.

To paraphrase the "Family Ties" theme: What would we do, baby, without all of you? And what would we do, baby, without this week's Croon a Tune quiz? Fortunately, that horrible fate can be averted by phoning 259-4012 -- give it four rings -- and lending an ear.

We promise to give it back.

Closing Credits: TN Media, an ad firm in New York, regales us with the following information:

"Will & Grace," "Frasier," "Stark Raving Mad" and "The West Wing" are the shows of choice for the richest network viewers, ages 18 to 49. All those shows are on NBC.

So we can infer that the ideal NBC viewer is a gay, pompous, mentally unhinged U.S. president.

Aren't you glad it's primary season? Now get out there and vote.

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