Columnist John Katsilometes: Here’s to the true survivor

Monday, Aug. 28, 2000 | 9:23 a.m.

John Katsilometes is the Sun features editor. His column appears Mondays. Reach him at kats@lasvegassun.com or 259-2327.

A few days ago I witnessed what had to be one of the greatest performances in game-show history.

It was not on "Survivor."

It was during an episode of "Win Ben Stein's Money." Slightly fewer than 51 million viewers (the reported TV audience that tuned in to "Survivor" on Wednesday night) regularly watch "Win Ben Stein's Money." It's on Comedy Central, conveniently positioned on Cox Cable channel 24 (to find it, go to CNN and make a right).

The show's host is a sharp and smarmy fellow whose claim to intelligencia prior to piloting this program was that he was a speech writer for Richard Nixon and he played the morose high school instructor in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off."

Stein's sidekick -- who is soon departing the show -- is a funny former Las Vegan, Jimmy Kimmel (who, incidentally, was arrested years ago for turning a fire extinguisher loaded with water on tourists while cruising in a convertible down the Strip).

The show's premise is easy for anyone to follow. Stein starts with $5,000 of his own money. Three contestants begin by answering questions in a "Jeopardy"-type format. Stein hosts one round, becomes a contestant in the second and squares off with the -- ahem -- survivor in the finale. Stein and the remaining contestant then answer a battery of 10 questions, and whoever answers the most questions in the final round wins. If the contestant comes out on top, he or she wins Stein's $5,000.

So I'm watching this particular installment and a quiet-but-deadly guy named Chris on a full-scale blitz. Who was the first barbarian ruler of Italy? "Odoacer." What is a ram's horn used in ancient times as a signalling trumpet? "A shofar." What's the major city in southwest Russia positioned on the Ural River? "Magnitogorsk."

By now Stein is agitated, rattled, mumbling under his breath. It's Watergate revisited. Chris blows out the other two contestants, correctly answering every question in the first round and slapping Stein around at will in the second.

But during commercial break Stein gathers himself for the final round and hits eight out of 10 questions. Stein wins about three-quarters of the shows and is usually bulletproof after connecting on eight questions in the finale.

But Chris steps up and hits nine of 10. Boom. In a half hour he misses one question: What's a bed that can be rolled under another bed when not in use? (A trundle bed.)

That, friends, is a quality game show.

A few days later the season finale of "Survivor" aired. The apex (or nadir) of the summer phenomenon was the diatribe unleashed at our own Kelly Wiglesworth by a truck driver named Susan, who apparently learned her people skills from Judge Judy.

Here are a full season of "Survivor" highlights: snotty Sue, nekkid Rich irking everyone but winning the $1 million, crotchety old Rudy becoming a fan favorite, Colleen and Greg having an affair (or not), a bevy of alliances being formed and fractured, and the consumption of larvae and grilled rat.

My feeling is, years from now, "Survivor" will be a fuzzy memory. But Chris will probably have turned his $5,000 into a fortune.