Columnist Ron Kantowski: It’s no joke: All eyes, ears were on Miller

Tuesday, Aug. 1, 2000 | 11:06 a.m.

Ron Kantowski's notes column appears Tuesday. Reach him at 259-4088 or ron@lasvegassun.com

I don't want to get off on a rant here, but if there's anybody who should appreciate Dennis Miller's presence in the Monday Night Football booth it's fellow MNF broadcast team rookie Dan Fouts.

Fouts could have sung the Oregon fight song during the two-minute warning or referred to Don Coryell as Don Corleone and nobody would have noticed. With the nation waiting for Miller to embarrass/prove himself as a football analyst during a meaningless preseason game, Fouts had a clean slate to say whatever he wanted. Or for that matter, nothing at all.

He could have split an atom during the pregame show and it wouldn't have overshadowed Miller's Time as the 49ers and Patriots slogged through the annual Hall of Fame game.

The early returns on Miller's performance were divided. Of the first five critics who weighed in on the newswire, two liked Miller, one didn't and two thought it was still too early to tell.

My take? Well, if you're a Miller fan, there was a lot to like about his debut. And if you're over 35 (i.e., not a Miller fan), you probably heard enough to confirm your disdain for the wisecracking Saturday Night Live alumnus. (For what it's worth, the majority of 18,000 viewers who voted in an ESPN poll gave Miller a "B" grade.)

If Dennis Miller proved anything Monday is that he is no Fred "The Hammer" Williamson.

I imagine most viewers will think that's a good thing.

But if you're Boomer Esaison, you're probably thinking Miller was hired two years too late.

There were more mentions of our fair city (or unfair city, if you believe what Geraldo Rivera had to say in Sunday night's special on Las Vegas that aired on NBC) than in a Pete Rose wiretap transcript.

Former (but reformed) baseball playboy Bo Belinsky, a veteran employee at a Saturn dealership in Henderson, is profiled in SI's prolific "Where Are They Now" special report while an item about the luxury high-rise Shaquille O'Neal is purchasing in Las Vegas' Park Towers (Shaq apparently won't close on the deal until a basketball court is installed) appeared in Scorecard.

James Miller -- you'll remember him as the "Fan Man" who dropped in on the 1993 Evander Holyfield-Riddick Bowe heavyweight title fight at Caesars Palace -- is now paragliding in Valdez, Alaska, according to an SI piece on one-hit wonders who had their 10 minutes of fame -- or in Miller's case, infamy.

Ex-Cincinnati Reds pitcher Gary Nolan and former Golden State Warriors general manager Richard Vertlieb, who now live here, are mentioned in a Las Vegas context in the "Champs of '75" photo essay.

And those notations are in addition to the usual Andre Agassi (Davis Cup pullout) and Greg Maddux (laser eye surgery) updates.

* AROUND THE HORN: Sun reader Gerry Baxter of North Las Vegas wants to know if Yankees second baseman Chuck Knoblauch ever played for the Stars. The answer, as the undamaged seats in the Cashman Field first-base grandstand will attest, is "no." However, an outfielder named Chris Knabenshue did play for Las Vegas in 1989. ... You never know who you're going to meet at the local In-N-Out Burger. Just hours after his fourth-place drive at CART's spectacular Michigan 500, transplanted Las Vegas racer Patrick Carpentier was spotted munching a Double-Double at the West Sahara location. The personable Quebec native seemed more excited about having just signed the papers on a new golf course home in Summerlin than zipping around Michigan's high banks at speeds approaching 250 mph. ... Here's one to put in your pipe: A reputable local boxing source (yes, they do ex ist) claims Victoria Bianco, the Cheetah's topless dancer who tried to make Mike Tyson's life a little more miserable, was ! hired to do so by Dr. Monica Turner, Tyson's estranged wife who has filed for divorce.

Hits and Misses

JAN-MICHAEL GAMBILL: The Mercedes-Benz Cup in Los Angeles, which annually attracts many of the world's top tennis players, this year featured more defections than Cuba's touring national baseball team. But Gambill did not want to be one of them, requesting that his bum legs and ankles be taped up at courtside so he could continue his championship match with former Henderson resident Michael Chang on Sunday. Alas, the pain proved to be too much for the gutsy Southern Californian, who was forced to retire with the match level at a set apiece. HIT.

JAN-MICHAEL GAMBILL: After the abbreviated final, Gambill thanked everybody under the warm Southern California sun for a wonderful week -- including the local Jaguar dealership which provided him with transportation. Too bad the tourney sponsors, the ones with the familiar silver logo on their blazers, were standing right alongside with the runner-up trophy. FAULT.