People in the News for February 12, 1998

Thursday, Feb. 12, 1998 | 10:56 a.m.

During these, the Winter Games of our discontent, America is crying out for heroes to make a showing in the mettle count, to display some backbone, some get-the-job-done pluck, and if we can't get it from our snowboarders, by God, we'll have to turn to our next best source: cable TV executives. The people at the Romance Classics Channel were set to trumpet Bill and Hillary Rodham Clinton as the most romantic couple of 1998 when they suddenly found themselves losing traction in the giant slalom of current events -- Clinterngate made a mockery of their plans! An agony-of-defeat moment threatened! Like many touched by la affaire Lewinsky, the Romance Classics Channel brain trust must have briefly wondered, What sort of quasi-believable story can we concoct to cover our rears on this? However, determined not to be yet another victim of Monica Lewinsky, the channel quickly regained its form, shoved Bill and Hill off lovers' leap, and without hesitation proclaimed Jay and Mavis Leno as the most romantic couple of the year. "Unlike many Hollywood couples, they've avoided the pitfalls of celebrity romance," said the network's president, Kate McEnroe. Roll that thrill-of-victory footage!

Briefly

To the question, If you can't be rude and annoying in a mental hospital, where can you be rude and annoying?, an answer quickly presents itself: talk radio, a mental hospital of the air. So it's in the spirit of little people on a power trip that Las Vegas radio station KVBC 105.1-FM -- affiliated with TV station KVBC Channel 3, where news comes first unless something really trivial, sensational or featuring cute-animal video is available -- is dangling $5 million in front of Monica Lewinsky to tell her story on its airwaves. The offer is serious, the station insists, and, unlike others Lewinsky has been extended, this one doesn't require her to get naked. "All we're interested in uncovering is the truth," says some guy at the station. "Our goal is the truth, and we're willing to pay to achieve our goal." While it sounds like another agony-of-defeat moment for American journalism's mettle hopes, really, in our world, it's kind of a nonincident.

Compiled by Scott Dickensheets