People in the News for February 5, 1998

Thursday, Feb. 5, 1998 | 9:17 a.m.

On one level, it was simply a cream pie to Bill Gates' face, administered by -- who else? -- a Belgian prankster as the Microsoft mogul arrived in Brussels Wednesday. Zany, you might say; madcap, even. But isn't it also likely that the culprit was really striking a blow on behalf of those oppressed by the tyrannical software of The Man? That, without a hint of Belgian waffling, he seized the opportunity to make a futile, yet stupid gesture of dissent as Gates continues his implacable march toward world domination? Who the hell knows when the culprit, one Noel Godin, explains his actions thusly: "This was a victory for us. We will continue to send our burlesque statements." Not exactly a stirring reaffirmation of proletarian solidarity there, Noel. Godin was not a lone pieman -- he was one of three Belgians who heaved cream at Gates. After cleaning the goop from his glasses and business suit, the pie-eyed Microsoftie emerged looking embarrassed. Police quickly arrested two of the culprits. "We regret the incident, but will not press charges," said a Microsoft spokesman.

Briefly

In '90s America, nothing says "I'm sorry" like saying "I'm sorry" on a syndicated tabloid TV show. In that spirit, Tonya Harding's ex -- once named Jeff Gillooly, now rechristened Jeff Stone -- apologizes for his role in Kneewhackgate on tonight's "Inside Edition." "I made a terrible mistake," he says. He was off balance, confused at the time, perhaps even cuckoo-house, which, as we know, is not good. But now he's found God, he says, which automatically qualifies him to pass judgment on his ex-wife (who will appear with Nancy Kerrigan tonight in a Fox special). "In my opinion, Tonya Harding is a sick woman," Stone says. "She continues to live the life that I lived with her. I feel sorry for Tonya Harding." And so ends another pie-in-the-eye day here at People in the News, where we continue to send our burlesque statements.

Compiled by Scott Dickensheets