People in the News for December 9, 1997

Tuesday, Dec. 9, 1997 | 9:57 a.m.

We here at People in the News are just the humble vessel of a higher power, which is using our typing fingers to spread the good word -- the good word that the streets and foolishly unlocked bedrooms of Malibu, Calif., are a bit safer for a while: Celebrity intoxicant Robert Downey Jr. is going to jail. "I am running out of ways to rehabilitate you," Municipal Judge Lawrence Mira said Monday as he sentenced the erratic actor to six months for a probation violation. For Downey's string of previous drug and alcohol arrests, Mira had let him off with fines and probation. Now, no more Mr. Nice Judge. "I'm going to incarcerate you, and I'm going to incarcerate you in a way that's very unpleasant for you," Mira told Downey. Whether that means he'll be strapped into one of those cool Hannibal Lecter contraptions or just placed with a cellmate named Honey Bunch who rasps, "Just love that Downey softness," remains unclear. "I don't care who you are," the judge said. "What I care about is that there is a life to be saved from drugs." The actor cried as he described battling drug addiction since age 8. High points of that struggle include numerous run-ins with the cops and the time a Malibu family found Downey passed out in their home. "I have no excuses," he said in court. "I find myself defenseless." Honey Bunch, for one, will be glad to hear that.

Briefly

Those animaniacs at Disney have finally succumbed to the obvious: the company will launch a 24-hour cartoon channel next spring. It didn't require the brain pan of a Bo Derek to make this call -- Disney built its reputation on cartoons and has more than 2,200 episodes in its vault. "Disney is clearly playing to its strengths," one TV analyst says. The new channel will be called Toon Disney. Its mission: to take down those poseurs at the Cartoon Network! Drawing pens at 20 paces! It's enough to make you wonder: Is the mediaverse big enough for two cartoon networks? We're raising our eyebrows in our usual charming way, but we're not ruling it out.

Compiled by Scott Dickensheets