If Locos win, where will ticker tape fly?

By Ron Kantowski

Monday, Aug. 3, 2009 | 11:40 a.m.

NOW

Question of the day, left on my voice mail: "If we are going to share our UFL team with Los Angeles, when the Locomotives win the inaugural title where are they going to hold the victory parade: down Boulder Highway or Wilshire Boulevard?"

First, two clarifications: UFL stands for United Football League, a start-up professional pigskin league in which Las Vegas will share a team with Los Angeles that apparently will be called the Locomotives.

I guess Boll Weevils, which would make about as much sense as Locomotives, already was taken.

As for the victory parade, I think they should split the difference and hold it it Victorville, Calif. To save time in getting there, the Locomotives could ride the Bullet Train.

THEN

If the Las Vegas team is serious about calling itself the Locomotives, then former New York Mets catcher Choo Choo Coleman should be the offensive coordinator.

Dick "Night Train" Lane would be the defensive coordinator and "Bullet" Bob Hayes would coach the receivers.