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Sam Morris / Las Vegas Sun
Bette Midler waves goodbye at the end of the final show of “The Showgirl Must Go On” at Caesars Palace Sunday, January 31, 2010.
Published Monday, Feb. 1, 2010 | 6:13 p.m.
Updated Monday, Feb. 1, 2010 | 11:36 p.m.
On a video tape, Celine Dion says good bye to Bette Midler during the final show of "The Showgirl Must Go On" at Caesars Palace Sunday, January 31, 2010.
Bette Midler wipes away a tear during the final show of "The Showgirl Must Go On" at Caesars Palace Sunday, January 31, 2010.
Bette Midler laughs with surprise guest Gadys Knight during the final show of "The Showgirl Must Go On" at Caesars Palace Sunday, January 31, 2010.
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The spectacle that was Bette Midler's "The Showgirl Must Go On" culminated its two-year engagement at Caesars Palace on Sunday night. It was a splendid send-off, with a legion of celebs descending on The Colosseum to bid Bette goodbye.
Not to turn this space into a "sightings" screed, but attending the show and Midler's post-show party at The Colosseum were: onetime "Dynasty" hellcat Joan Collins, Elaine Wynn, renowned singer/songwriter Carol Bayer Sager, Tony Basil (Midler's choreographer), a remarkably thin Paula Abdul, Mr. Las Vegas Wayne Newton, "Phantom — Las Vegas Spectacular" driving force Anthony Crivello, Flamingo headliner Rita Rudner, comic and longtime Midler confidant Bruce Vlanich, a beaming Marie Osmond, the legendary Gladys Knight and a puppet-less Terry Fator (there's no logical order of procession for this list).
Knight appeared onstage during Midler's performance to sing, "The Way We Were," to warm response. Osmond showed up, too, having survived Midler's assault of F-bomb-sprinkled material to inform Miss M that the Mormon F-word is "Fifty." Lacking a scripted "walk-off" line, it was good stuff from Osmond.
Also tucked into the show was an appearance by Hawaiian ukulele artist Jake Shimabukuro, who teamed with Midler on a hypnotic version of The Beatles' "In My Life" and soloed on "While My Guitar Gently Weeps." Matching Shimabukuro's virtuosity is a tall order for the guy who portrays the gifted ukuleleist in "Legends In Concert," if there is such a person.
And speaking of tall orders, there is the matter of replacing Midler as a Caesars headliner. In an entertainment climate that's about as reliable as the gas pedal on a 2005 Toyota Avalon, AEG Live/Concerts West executives for weeks have been hammering out a plan of attack to fill the 4,100-seat showroom with high-caliber entertainment. This strategy includes booking any measure of performer, ranging from nationally known ventriloquist Jeff Dunham to the traveling trio of Remus Choy Yat Kit, Calvin Choy Yat Chi and Edmond So Chi Wai. You probably know these fellows as the spirited singing/dancing act Grasshopper, scheduled to perform at The Colosseum to celebrate Chinese New Year (or, if you will, Valentine's Day) on Feb. 14.
We imagined a meeting of AEG Live/Concerts West executives back in April, as they round-tabled a plan to replace Elton John. We again envision a top-secret meeting of relevant and suited people swapping ideas to replace Midler ...
Executive I: OK, first, a moment of silence for the late Bette Midler ...
Executive II: She's not dead!
Executive I: No, but her last show started 15 minutes behind schedule!
Executive II: Nice.
Executive I Can I get a rim shot!
Executive III: Didn't Pete Barbutti tell a joke like that once? Cross Pete Barbutti off the list.
Executive I: OK. Seriously, folks. Maybe we should be looking at comics, right? Anyone out there?
Executive II: Jay Leno!
Executive III: Oh, sure. He's got more baggage than Bette's opening number.
Executive I: Right, and if I wanted old material I'd call ...
Executive III: Pete Barbutti?
Executive I: Right. And we've already got Jerry Seinfeld. Who else?
Executive II: Chelsea Lately!
Executive III: That's the name of her show. You mean, Chelsea Handler.
Executive I: Chelsea Effing Handler, actually. Talk about a raunchy act. She makes Bette Midler look like Marie Osmond.
Executive II: Well, hey! What about Donny & Marie!
Executive I: Not bad. Their ticket sales at the Flamingo Showroom have been off the hook.
Executive III: "Off the hook?" Sounds like you're channeling Don Marrandino.
Executive II: Guilty. But we're talking about 3,500 more seats at The Colosseum than the Flamingo. I don't know ...
Executive I: We could work in some sort of a promotion. Every ticket holder also gets a signed Marie Osmond doll.
Executive III: You think Marie Osmond is going to commit to signing several thousand dolls a week?
Executive I: I never said anything about Marie signing the dolls.
Executive II: Then who's signing them? Cher?
(Laughter)
Executive I: OK, put Donny & Marie down. Who else?
Executive III: Celine Dion!
Executive I: Working on it, working on it.
Executive III: The box office staff would form a conga line.
Executive II: It wouldn't be the first time.
Executive I: OK, who else?
Executive II: Mariah Carey, no?
Executive I: We'll see how it goes Feb. 27. A real possibility.
Executive III: Right. But am I the only one concerned with that drunken speech she gave at the People's Choice Awards?
Executive I: Yes.
Executive II: I, for one, love her.
Executive III: But what if she shows up onstage in that condition? Ever think of that?
Executive I:No. I mean, what's the worst that could happen?
Executive II: She could do a show drunk, is all. Has that ever happened at Caesars Palace?
Executive I: Let's ask the ghost of Dean Martin.
Executive III: Wow. All right, I'm in. Rack Mariah Carey.
Executive I: Watch how you say that. OK, who else?
Executive III: Celine Dion!
Executive I: She's already on the list!
Executive III: Lest we forget ...
Executive I: OK, who else?
Executive II: Garth Brooks!
Executive I: Oh, that's funny.
Executive II: I told you about Garth Brooks.
Executive III: He did great in those private shows here last year, right?
Executive I: Yes, and if anyone had kicked in with an 11-seat Challenger Jet — new or used — I would have been really happy.
Executive II: Well, 4,000 seats is a lot for just a guy with a guitar.
Executive III: We've got Jerry Seinfeld and he's a guy with no guitar.
Executive I: Point taken, but that horse has left the barn, as it were. Who else?
Executive II: Matt Goss!
Executive I: A Goss-pirational idea! But shouldn't we at least finish renovating Cleopatra's Barge before we put him in the Goss-oleum? I mean, Colosseum?
Executive III: Give him a New Year's Eve show and see what happens.
Executive II: It won't be the Barge, but it'll be sink or swim for Matt Goss!
Executive I: Oooh, that's Gossy-good. Give that to our marketing department.
Executive II: Will do!
Executive I: OK, who else?
Executive III: Celine Dion!
Executive II (adopting a Ricky Ricardo accent): Eeef it's not Celine, we have some 'splainin' to do!
Executive III: Well, we could always call Elton back.
Executive I: Or, Jake Shimabukuro. He's great.
Executive II: He's the Garth Brooks of the ukulele, and he has his own transportation.
Executive I: Amen to that.
Follow John Katsilometes on Twitter at twitter.com/JohnnyKats.
What about Billy Joel ?
Bring on Lady GaGa!!!
Executive I: I see a Billy Joel/Lady Gaga co-headlining production, like Billy has done with Elton! Oh, this SINGS to me!
President Clinton was an inspired idea then maybe the Pope and /or Nelson Mandela?
how about someone that has had a hit record in this century?
the only people that can afford to come to vegas anymore are 20 somethings.
She's still out there touring ( which means she's not a has been ) but Stevie Nicks would be awesome !
To fill this size of a venue you need someone BIG ......
only a handful can do it....but would they.
TINA TURNER
JIMMY BUFFET
I WOULD GO WITH BUFFET CAUSE THE FORUM IS RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET FROM HIS RESTAURANT.
Keep the show price under $50. Atleast for us locals
Las Vegas entertainment prices are WAY out of control.
the method of giving one talent a 2 or 3 year run just seems out of date.
cut back a little on the production value and do a 4 - 6 week run.
cher? better middler? jimmy buffet?
huh?
yuck, yuck, yuck!
give no doubt a few weeks, then coldplay a few weeks, then john mayer a few weeks, then maroon 5 a few weeks.
each time that talent turns over, it will give people a reason to come to vegas for the weekend and it would keep vegas fresh.
Beyonce, Whitney Houston maybe... 6 week runs are a good idea.
Midler was not that good and wont be too hard to replace. Just get a performer far past her prime and throw in a few F Bombs and you have it.
lets get people in for a few weeks at a time - switch it up - different singers - etc. sick of the same show for 2 years????? Make it around $50 bucks and you would sell seats... Dont like the expensive shows - I did go a few years ago to Eric Clapton - brooks and dunn - but my casino host picked up the tab.. well casino hosts are only picking up tabs if you are a whale. No little whales anymore.. Guess I am a dolphin...
it's obvious they're going for people in their 50s and 60s with these marquis acts and in the 2000's that made sense. they were at the peak of their careers, empty nesters, big 401k's, with money to spend.
now, they are having to work another 2 or 3 years because they have no home equity, their 401k has tanked, their kids have moved back home, etc.
the one age group that CAN afford to come here are 20 somethings that don't have kids, no mortgage, etc. and cher, middler, buffet, manilow...those "talents" just don't speak to them.
Whatever happened to Celine and her zillion $ salary?
Your Script was hilarious John!!! Caesars is a great venue for people to pass through. Great idea stevem. Vegas entertainment is stuck with the same problems of NBC: how can we make the same or more money with a dying business plan. NBC tried Jay @ 10 and that stunk to high heaven, hopefully Vegas gives this limited residency @ the Caesars a chance and it doesn't stink either. Knowing that Coldplay will be here for 4-6 weeks gives us all a chance to procrastinate (not good for the venue), but if they were here just 2 days the show would be sold out easily. That's the dilemma.
Billy Joel, Whitney Houston
What about Michael Buble
Billy Idiol lol
The Eagles would be the best fit for that room.
William Shatner reading all his favorite songs!
Madonna would be the first choice of AEG to fill weeks at The Colosseum, but she probably has no interest. Barbra Streisand wouldn't do it either. Lady Gaga would be great for limited engagements but doesn't have the time-tested appeal to fill a long run. Celine Dion will probably be back by the very end of the year.
How about anyone that knows how to sing and not LIPSINC like the new entertainers do !!
I would pay to see Shatner reprise his spoken-word rendition of "Rocket Man." What a time THAT would be. Throw some Cirque-style performers in there. Huge.
Hey stevem--I know that this is pretty much your full time "job" but you ever make a post that wasn't negative?
Btw, no one's mentioned Stevie Wonder.